from poke to I do

Next Chapter - Family

2011-04-22T03:42:00.000-04:00

I am finally entering the next new chapter in my life, and I'm ready to say farewell to my wedding obsessed world. I'm hitting "unsubscribe" to a handful of wedding blogs right now. Weddings are no longer the focus in my life. My main focus is on my new family. :)

After I Do: Honesty & Lying

2011-04-10T11:58:00.000-04:00

Communication, Honesty, and Lying - Do you ever lie to your spouse? How honest does the honesty in your relationship go?

I am a very honest person, brutally honest at times. I think that communication is so important in any relationship, whether it's a marriage, friendship, or a business relationship. A lot of problems stem from lack of communication or miscommunication. If you're going to communicate effectively, then you might as well be honest about everything. There is no use lying unless you have something to hide. When it comes to that point, then something has gone very wrong.

White lies aside (ex. birthday surprises), I do not lie to my husband. I don't think it's even possible. I want to share every detail with him, even the stuff he probably doesn't want to know. Occasionally I will "lie" playfully, and he knows the real answer. Hehe. I'm so bad at keeping secrets from him too. One year I bought him the complete series of Friends on DVD for his birthday, and I told him a day or two before it came in the mail. I really am that pathetic.

What about H? Sometimes I think we're the same person. We approach honesty and lying in the same way. The biggest secret he ever kept from me was the engagement ring and proposal. He was itching with excitement to the point where he popped the question the same day the ring came in, which wasn't part of his original plan. He wasn't even patient enough to keep the ring for a few days and wait for the weekend. Silly husband.

Big smiles plastered on our faces after H popped the big question

We both know that if either one of us every lied to the other, we have some serious problems. It goes beyond the lying, and the problem goes down much deeper. We try our best to be honest to one another at all times and to communicate -- the good and the bad . Neither of us will accept lying or deception.

It's us against the world. :)

Check out other responses from the famous bees themselves over here!

After I Do:
Finances
Changes
Children
Wedding Regrets
Name-Change Decisions
Household Chores
First Anniversary

Leave & Cleave

In-Laws

Appreciation

Disagreements

Date Night

Changes

After I Do: Changes

2011-04-08T11:57:00.000-04:00

What's the biggest way you've changed personally now that you're married? How did this change come about?

The biggest personal change would be growing from being a couple to a family. Marriage didn't change our relationship as a couple because we had the foundation of a marriage before the legal "I do." When we discovered that I was pregnant, everything shifted for us. Our priorities changed, and now we had to focus on having another being added to our super awesome team.

Seeing Ninja for the first time on the ultrasound screen.

Physically I have changed. Have you seen my stomach? Sure, there's only an extra 17lbs of me physically there, but the baby keeps growing every single day. I waddle like a penguin. I'm a lot slower, and I take my time when I go for a walk. My lower back can't take too much activity either. I bet I'm stronger though. My body had to adapt to carrying all of this extra weight after all.

Keep in mind that this photo was taken 3 weeks ago... I'm even bigger now.

Emotionally I have changed. Pregnancy hormones are a pain in the butt. One moment I could be crying over the silliest thing ever, and the next moment I am super frustrated with the world. It's like that time of the month, except times that by ten.

There is this motherly side of me that has emerged from this whole pregnancy. Maybe it naturally comes with the hormones? I feel the need to take care of my little Ninja in every way possible. I want to provide him with the best environment ever, and I love the little guy so darn much. It's crazy how attached I am to him. While I'm not exactly ready for the hours of labor or learning how to take care of an infant, I am looking forward to meeting him. When I talk to him, I think he is listening and actually understands me.

Technically this change affects me the most due to the whole carrying-a-child-inside-of-me part. Looking at the whole picture, the change affects us as a couple. It turns our family of two into a family of three. We will need to work together to learn how to become super awesome parents to a wonderful baby Ninja. Our responsibilities will extend beyond taking care of ourselves, and we will have an extra being to love and smother with kisses all day long. Boy it's one heck of a change, but we take the challenge with great stride. It's part of our adventure. It's our family. :)

We're always ready for an adventure!

Check out other responses from the famous bees themselves over here!

After I Do:
Finances
Changes
Children
Wedding Regrets
Name-Change Decisions
Household Chores
First Anniversary

Leave & Cleave

In-Laws

Appreciation

Disagreements

Date Night

After I Do: Date Night

2011-04-07T10:36:00.001-04:00

Do you and your spouse plan "date nights" now that you're married? What's the most fun date you've been on since getting married?

Yes, we do plan date nights even as a married couple, especially in the remaining weeks before the baby arrives. This is our last chance to have date nights without hiring a babysitter, and we sure do take advantage of it.

What is the typical date for a married couple? Mainly, it goes unplanned. We just go out, eat dinner, and shop around in the area. It sounds kind of boring, but it is very much us. Occasionally we'll toss in a movie or special outing to a new place. I'm a fan of simply going to the coffee shop and sitting there for hours talking to each other. He's an even bigger fan of the diner experience, but it's getting more difficult to find decent diners in our area.

makes total sense why we love coffee shops & diners -- the first weeks of our relationship were spent there talking for hours

Korner Diner - Summer 2005

Since getting married, the most fun date we've had has been our yearly beach trip. It sounds silly since we do it every single year, and technically it doesn't qualify as a "date," more or less just a trip. I just love the excitement leading up to the big day and all of the planning that's involved. By planning, I mean simply making sushi and prepping snacks for the road. The feeling of the sun beating down on us and just being able to relax on the beach is perfection. This year's trip was extra special too. H met Delilah. It was also Ninja's first beach trip (in the womb), and we didn't even know it!

making a pit stop for sausage at Helen's Sausage House... yum!!

being super awesome & enjoying the beach

Celebrating 5 years together, photo booth style!

Once the little Ninja arrives, our date nights will be spent mainly at home. Instead of going out to eat, we'll order in. We'll even make the adventure out to the library to borrow DVDs and have movie night at home with a bag of microwave popcorn. Date night is all about spending extra quality time together with little interruptions. I just love spending time with my husband. :)

P.S. Occasionally we get dressed up for fancy dinners too! It doesn't happen very often, but we have a blast every time we get a chance to spend too much money on a nice dining experience.

Wish I could say we paid for dinner, but it was our wedding present treat from Anthony & Melissa. Thanks guys!!

Morimoto - Summer 2010

Check out other responses from the famous bees themselves over here!

After I Do:
Finances
Changes
Children
Wedding Regrets
Name-Change Decisions
Household Chores
First Anniversary

After I Do: Disagreements

2011-04-06T10:55:00.000-04:00

How do you handle disagreements? Do you and your SO have specific arguing styles? What topic do you seems to argue/disagree on the most? What were some things you and your spouse have done to work out disagreements?

We're usually on the same page on a lot of things. If we have differing views, we tend to talk to each other to further understand. We agree more than we disagree. Sometimes it is okay to disagree. We are individuals with our own opinions -- ex. condiments are yucky to me & yummy to him. I'm obviously not going to push him to get rid of his condiments (although we could save a few dollars if we didn't have to buy mustard and ketchup... hehe).

As for arguments, they usually stem from frustration. My husband doesn't get easily frustrated, but I'm the complete opposite at times. Early in our relationship, I probably kept my feelings hidden but expressed it in my body language. Then I stepped up to the plate, and I am brutally honest when something is wrong. We have responsibilities at home, which mainly consist of keeping it clean and orderly (ha). I try my best to clean up after everyone's mess, and I usually don't mind. There are times when I ask H to put something away in the basement. I will ask him multiple times over the course of weeks and sometimes months. Eventually I reach my boiling point, and I get extremely frustrated. Words are spoken. My feelings are out in the air. My voice probably gets louder, and I eventually leave the room. H doesn't like seeing me upset. While I need some space to calm myself down, H is there following me like a lost puppy. Poor hubby.

Now let's switch gears. H does not like confrontation, and he never yells at me, ever! Sure, I get in trouble for heavy lifting while pregnant and such, but crazy old me actually tells him these things (the honest part of me comes out again). By trouble, he just tells me not to do it again and to be careful. "Ninja!" Hehe.

What does he do when I'm the one yelling at him? He keeps quiet. Sometimes he doesn't know what to say or says the wrong things (he's in the spotlight). He understands that I'm frustrated. He understands that he should pick up some slack. It's just the point of getting there is hard for him. He is a tad on the lazy side, like most men. I know he appreciates the work I do around the house, and I would appreciate it if he could do more work sometimes. In my pregnant state, I have to be more dependent on him to get a few tasks done -- ex. take the trash to the sidewalk, break down recycling boxes, and lift heavy items up or down the stairs.

By having our arguments, we both know that the issue has reached its boiling point. I can't say that we effectively argue because a month later we might be having the same exact conversation. It takes two people to work out a problem, and maybe I cannot take the laziness out of my husband. I can either accept it or keep arguing whenever I reach maximum frustration. I think it's still a learning process for me.

This was a lengthy response, and I'm not sure if I concluded anything about our argument styles or disagreements. I think most of our arguments come from me being overwhelmed with my responsibilities and not having enough help. How can we work on it? I do my best to communicate. Maybe it's up to my husband to contribute more?

Check out other responses from the famous bees themselves over here!

After I Do:
Finances
Changes
Children
Wedding Regrets
Name-Change Decisions
Household Chores
First Anniversary

After I Do: Divorce

2011-04-05T11:43:00.006-04:00

What are your opinions on divorce? Have your opinions changed now that you are married? Do you and your SO openly talk about the possibility of divorce? Why or why not?

My parents have been married for almost 40 years, and H's parents have been married for almost 30 years. Even though my parents have been together for so long, I don't exactly believe that they are soul mates or have a healthy marriage. At times I think it would be better if they were divorced. They don't have the best relationship, and my mom drives my dad absolutely nuts. She is super dependent on him to survive, and my dad would never leave her. My dad wants to enjoy his life, and my mom is there preventing him from doing so. It is a very odd relationship, and I wonder if they would be happier apart.

Asians don't accept divorce as an option, and I think we need to break that trend. I most certainly do not want to be "stuck" in an unhappy marriage, and I don't want that to be the case for anyone else. If trust is broken, cheating is involved, or abuse occurs, then there are necessary steps to take to determine where to go from there. Therapy might be the first step. Divorce might be the last one. No one wants to become part of the divorce statistics, but I don't want any person to have to suffer in their marriage. Of course I don't want people to consider divorce an option as an easy way out of a marriage. Each and every relationship requires a lot of work from both partners. You can't divorce because you don't want to work on the marriage. That is just silly, but it does happen more often than I would like.

H and I talk about the possibility of divorce, and there are circumstances in which I would leave him. I'll be honest here. I do believe that we are soul mates, and we would have never gotten married if we didn't think that we were perfect for each other. Communication and honesty is really important in a relationship. I think as long as we can always trust and talk to one another, we will be happy as can be. What about abuse? What about cheating? That's when we enter the territory for the possibility of divorce. How can either one of us be happy if there is abuse or cheating? How can we suffer and let our children suffer as well? We would have to examine how we got into the bad place to begin with and see what our options are from there. I would never rule out divorce. I deserve to be happy. H deserves to be happy. Our children deserve to be happy. It would be selfish for either one of us to stay in the marriage and continue to suffer.

That being said, I hope we never reach that point. I have full confidence that we can make it through every bump in the road, and there is nothing that can break us apart. We are partners in this game called life, and it will always be us against the world.

Check out other responses from the famous bees themselves over here!

After I Do:
Finances
Changes
Children
Wedding Regrets
Name-Change Decisions
Household Chores
First Anniversary
Leave & Cleave
In-Laws
Appreciation

Inspiration - Spud Bar

2011-04-04T12:52:00.000-04:00

Dessert bars are sooo 2010. Why not have a spud bar with the all the yummy potato fixings? My baby is Irish, and he absolutely loves potatoes of all kinds. I can see him running up to the table and grabbing every single item to sample. Of course this is when he's old enough to attend an event with a spud bar and able to walk. I'm getting a tad ahead of myself. He's still in the womb! Okay crazy mom mode just kicked in. I'll make him a spud bar for his 2nd birthday party. He should be able to fully enjoy it by then, right? Yuppers!

Photography by Tinywater Photography

Floral Design & Styling by Botanica Floral Designs

Featured in The Inspired Bride

After I Do: Appreciation

2011-04-04T12:45:00.000-04:00

How do you show your spouse that you appreciate them? What does he/she do for you?

I tend to express my gratitude by saying "thank you" a lot. Then it's usually followed by, "I appreciate it." Haha. I am soooo obvious at showing how much I appreciate my husband. Seriously though, I love the guy, and he puts up with a lot of my mess. Don't worry. I have to put up with a lot too. Hehe.

By simply saying "thank you," I hope he does understand that I really do mean it. I practically wake him up every single night to go downstairs to bring me another glass of water. He never complains, and he always gets up to tend to my water needs. Now if there is a huge noise in the middle of the night, chances are the guy is going to sleep right through it and not try to protect me. I kid, I kid.

How do I know H appreciates me? He says, "How do you put up with me?" Enough said. =P

So my husband doesn't bring me roses home every night (I would yell at him anyways. Flowers die, and they are expensive), but he does bring home surprises every now and then. I sobbed like a baby when he came home with a Valentine's day card. I didn't even open it. He simply handed over an envelope, and I cried instantly. I didn't expect it one bit (we're not heart day people). That card happened to be the very same card I lusted over at Anthropologie the week before. He remembered. :)

Anatomy of Love Card - Rifle Paper Co.

Then there is that one time when he brought home Girl Scout cookies after hearing me constantly talk about them. He even tracked them down and made sure to buy me a box. That made my week. He entertained me and drove me everywhere in search of Lemonades too.

Oh and there was that period when I thought I was dying, and he came home with balloons for me. I absolutely adore balloons, and the sight of them cheered me up right away. That was the first time he ever bought me balloons, and it meant so much to me. By the way, I wasn't dying. I was pregnant. Hehe.

My husband sure does love me, and I know he appreciates me just by the way he looks at me or the surprises he has up his sleeves. He smothers me with hugs and kisses every single day.

examples of kisses -- Ocean City 2009

I'm really making H look like a super hero of a husband. I'll just leave it at that. No need for me to brag about my super power abilities to be the best wife ever.

Check out other responses from the famous bees themselves over here!

After I Do:
Finances
Changes
Children
Wedding Regrets
Name-Change Decisions
Household Chores
First Anniversary
Leave & Cleave
In-Laws

After I Do: In-Laws

2011-04-01T11:26:00.000-04:00

What was your relationship with your in-laws like before you got married? What is it like now? What were specific things that lead to an improvement/degradation of your relationship with your in-laws? Do you have any tips for people struggling with relationships with their in-laws?

Haha.. I guess this topic had to come up. It's not like I neglect to mention them in my previous posts or anything. Oddly enough, this question does add more information behind my relationship with my in-laws that I may forget to mention in the heat of the moment. Here goes!

Before marriage my in-laws were pretty awesome. They're the kind of laid back Asian parents that I never knew existed. H also comes from a pretty huge family on his dad's side, and I absolutely loved all family gatherings. It fulfilled a part of me that I never had growing up with only my immediate family. His parents welcomed me to their home when I separated from my own parents. Even before then, they would allow me to stay the night in H's room with no problems. They treated me like their own daughter early on. His dad was especially supportive of our relationship.

I lived with my in-laws for two very long years. It's not fun to live with your own parents, and it's not always fun to live with your future in-laws either. For me it didn't feel like home. Only my parent's house felt like home, which is odd given that it's kind of a restaurant and all. So I had a very difficult time adjusting, and I never fully accepted it as home for me. By the summer of 2009, I was really anxious to leave and find a house with H. We had just begun our home search, and it was a tough time. Every single thing bothered us, and we wanted to get out as soon as humanly possible.

Well this is when we first ran into problems. His parents wanted to have a bigger role in our house buying process. We offended them greatly, and they did not make us forget. I saw an ugly side that I had never seen before. Almost a year and a half later, and I still cannot forget what happened, nor can I fully get over it.

Fast forward to our wedding. Oh boy. This will be for another time when I can get into the full details of everything that went downhill. Let's just say that I thought all of my ill feelings would at least start to go away by now. Well they haven't, and I'm not sure if they ever will.

The house and wedding issues have changed my relationship with my in-laws. I still carry around those bad feelings with me, and I don't know when I can eventually let go. I am scared of how our relationship might change (better or worse? who knows?) once Ninja arrives. I prefer spending time with my own dysfunctional family over spending time with my in-laws sometimes. It's weird. Can we just rewind back 3-4 years when everything was just fine? That would be great.

I have learned that my not so great relationship with my in-laws is common. I am not alone in my struggle. It is difficult to be accepted in a new family, especially when the prized first and only son is involved. Yeah I thought I was the one being taken away from my family (that's what my MIL told me to my face). It just so happens that I have taken their son away from the family home. Who knew I was so evil?

Hopefully time will heal the wounds of the past. Maybe a little baby will bring us all together? Somehow I think it may cause more problems, but I'll let time tell.

Check out other responses from the famous bees themselves over here!

After I Do:
Finances
Changes
Children
Wedding Regrets
Name-Change Decisions
Household Chores
First Anniversary
Leave & Cleave

After I Do: Leave and Cleave

2011-03-16T17:20:00.001-04:00

Leave and Cleave - Some people have trouble leaving and cleaving -- that is, they have difficulty adjusting to making their NEW family with their spouse as the primary family. What was that transition like for you? And how did your family of origin handle it?

Even though I knew H was the one for me when we first started dating over 5 years ago, I only knew how it felt to want to marry him. I knew how it felt to be a team and to be on the same side. Marriage didn't change that much for us because we had experienced most aspects of married life before saying, "I do." The actual feeling of being a family settled in only recently for me. Sure, you could say the physical addition of a baby would make us feel more like a family. Even without the baby in my tummy, I feel like a family unit now more than ever before.

This is the start of our lives, and we are our own family now. It is recognized through marriage by the ones around us. Our priorities are to each other, and we take care of one another. That doesn't mean that our parents don't mean anything to us anymore. It just means that we need to take care of ourselves first sometimes. It means that we have to focus on our relationship and our needs.

I know that it might sound silly, especially to our parents. My in-laws would love for us to stop thinking about ourselves and to think about the families we came from. What about our newly formed family of two? They want us to call often, visit without being asked, and to invite them over every now and then. Then we feel super guilty when it's been a few weeks without a visit, and I don't want to feel that guilt. I want them to think of us as a family, one that may be busy on the weekends and unable to visit all the time. We have priorities to get the house ready for our Ninja. We need to enjoy the limited time to ourselves that we have before Ninja's arrival as well. These are our needs, and I would love if my in-laws could see that too.

As for my parents, they do recognize us as a family unit. They used to invite us over for dinner fairly often, but now they know that we can't visit as often anymore due to changes in our lives. Instead my parents might make us some food and bring it over because they know we're busy. Somehow they are very understanding in ways that I never knew possible years ago.

So now we're a family, and we're a growing family too. Our needs will constantly change. Our priorities will always be to one another. We will never forget where we came from, and our parents will always be an important part of our lives.

our small family of three :)

Check out other responses from the famous bees themselves over here!

After I Do:
Finances
Changes
Children
Wedding Regrets
Name-Change Decisions
Household Chores
First Anniversary

After I Do: First Anniversary

2011-03-11T12:29:00.000-05:00

How did you celebrate your first anniversary? If you exchanged gifts, what did you get each other?

Since we have not reached our first year anniversary, I cannot tell you exactly what will happen. I have a feeling that it will just be a relaxed evening at home with our little Ninja. We'll break out the top layer of our wedding cake that has been resting in the freezer for the past year. It'll be an interesting food experience. I don't think either one of us has had year old cake before. It'll be very low key.

Photo Courtesy of Jubilee Photography

I will admit that neither one of us thought that we would have a new addition in our family before our one year anniversary. That does affect the way we will celebrate. We can't exactly go on that honeymoon that we missed out on. Having a family will change our priorities.

As for gifts, we're pretty content on the gifts we gave each other on our wedding day. No need for anniversary gifts. Now our money goes towards our family. Oh how much changes when you fully become a responsible adult. :)

I wonder if our wedding anniversary will one day be the only anniversary that we celebrate. Currently we forget about the wedding, and we still celebrate our dating anniversary. It's weird, but it still holds a very special place in our hearts.

at my sister's wedding -- our first month of dating

Check out other responses from the famous bees themselves over here!

After I Do:
Finances
Changes
Children
Wedding Regrets
Name-Change Decisions
Household Chores

After I Do: Household Chores

2011-03-10T13:33:00.000-05:00

How do you divide up the household chores? Did it change, once you were married? Do you divide your chores along gender lines/traditional stereotypes? If so, was it intentional?

I can say that I pull a lot of weight in the household chores. It's my natural tendency to want to clean and not be a slob. That being said, H is more of the laid back type. He usually makes the mess, and I'm there to clean up after him. I wash the dishes, sweep the floors, do laundry, and all the basic stuff to keep the house tidy. H does the manly stuff of sorts -- works on the car, cuts the grass, repairs what is broken, and occasionally listens to me when I ask him to help me. We share cooking duty, and we both have our own special dishes that we individually make. I will not clean toilets, and H will get to them after I ask him about a dozen times. Hehe.

H hard at work replacing the broken garage opener

Marriage didn't change our roles, but my pregnancy did toss it up a bit. Since I stayed at home, it made more sense for me to carry an extra load. Before H would occasionally be in charge of dish washing duty, and now I am the only one who gets messy with the kitchen sink. I cook more often as well, and he loves coming home to dinner on the table. Wait, go back a bit. Does it actually make sense for me to do more work now that I'm at home and pregnant? I think the pregnant part probably gives me a special reward to stay off my feet, relax, and eat all day long. Unfortunately, I do not have that life.

you'll often find me in the kitchen washing dishes

Our chores are somewhat divided among gender lines, except I tend to cross my line pretty often. I want to be the one outside cutting the grass, but he won't let me! He feels embarrassed if our neighbors see me doing the man's job around the house. I also love to shovel the snow in the winter, but I was laid off shoveling duty this year due to the little Ninja. Boo. Often I would be the one getting the trash ready and taking it outside on trash day. This winter I have been hibernating and leaving that task to H, which can be risky. There are more than a few times when he forgets, and then we hear the trash truck drive right by our house the next morning. D'oh!

putting up the Christmas lights

I'll admit that there are days when I feel unappreciated. I do a lot of chores around the house, and it's all become the norm. I know he appreciates my hard work, but it would be nice to get more help. I often ask him to bring stuff down to the basement or assist in heavy lifting (he won't let me since I'm carrying a Ninja). There will be other chores that I'm incapable of doing, and I often remind him. It can take weeks for him to get around to it, and boy does that bug me. Actually, I'm lucky if it only takes a few weeks. It usually takes months.

There are times when I'm constantly cleaning, and he is sitting in front of the laptop. Oh boy does that irk me! Luckily I can usually ask him to do a specific task, and he'll be right on it. Maybe that makes up for him not doing anything in the first place? I guess he can't read my mind when I glare at the back of his head.

scrubbing down the countertops

Oooh... story time! We ran out of toothpaste in the main bathroom, and he leaves me with the empty tube. Later that evening, he noticed that I replaced the empty tube with a new one. He told me that he was going to remind me to replace it, but I had gotten to it before he had a chance to inform me. Umm... he was already upstairs, and he planned on coming down to tell me that the toothpaste needed to be replaced. Toothpaste is located in the hallway closet. It's not that far from the bathroom, but he would have preferred to tell me to replace it. Reminder -- I am pregnant! Oye.

Check out other responses from the famous bees themselves over here!

After I Do:
Finances
Changes
Children
Wedding Regrets
Name-Change Decisions
Other Relationships

After I Do: Other Relationships

2011-03-09T11:16:00.002-05:00

How has your marriage affected your relationships (with family, friends, coworkers, etc.)? Have you noticed a change in any of your other relationships now that you're married?

Since we have been together for so long, our relationships with friends stayed the same. We have always been a unit, and most of our friends see us that way. We don't need to hang out with other couples to feel like we're on the same page. We have a lot of mutual friends, which probably came about because we're inseparable. Don't get me wrong. I do occasionally hang out with my friends without H, and H hangs out with his friends without me.

our friends come out to celebrate a birthday and a graduation -- yipee!

With my family there has been a drastic change, but it didn't come from marriage. It came right after H and I purchased a home together. My parents did not accept H in the beginning. They don't like boys of any sort, especially the ones that take their daughters away. When I first told them that I was engaged, they treated the situation as if I told them I had a boyfriend. They kept telling me that I'm a good catch and could do so much better. I should get to know him first because 2.5 years certainly was not enough. Haha. So I asked how long my parents knew each other before getting married (either 2 weeks or 2 months), but they responded back with the fact that it's just different. Uh huh. Sure.

Fast forward to move in day, and my parents all of a sudden forget the past and start accepting H. They don't mind that we're living together in "sin." Instead they are proud of us for moving out of H's parents house. Eh? It has something to do with the horrors of living with your in laws, and they didn't want me to suffer. Thanks, mom and dad. Well everything turned around, and my parents have accepted H ever since.

Photo Courtesy of Jubilee Photography

Now I would have to say the opposite for our relationship with H's parents. They have very high expectations from us, and we seem to always fall short. If I did a side by side comparison of our parents, it would be surprising how relaxed and non-traditional my parents have become. His parents, on the other hand, have been very disappointed in us. Nothing is ever good enough. We certainly don't do enough to reach out to them. It's just an ugly picture all around. Plus I haven't moved on from the regrets from our wedding day or even the long drawn out arguments over purchasing a house. I have a feeling there will be more problems to come with the addition of a Ninja.

with H's parents after our courthouse ceremony

At the same time we are hopeful that our relationship with his parents will change. I am hopeful that I can move on and leave the past behind (that's going to be a toughie). I hope that H will reach out to his parents more often. I'm usually the one who has to convince him to visit them on an occasional weekend. It's not going to be easy, but we'll work towards it one step at a time.

I am very thankful for the great relationships that we do have with our friends and my parents. It can be difficult at times to figure out the perfect balance and while doing so as a couple.

Check out other responses from the famous bees themselves over here!

After I Do:
Finances
Changes
Children
Wedding Regrets

Name-Change Decisions

After I Do: Name-Change Decisions

2011-03-08T11:52:00.001-05:00

If you debated changing your name before the wedding, what did you eventually decide and how has it worked out for you thus far? If you could go back and do it differently, would you have?

I thought this would be an easy decision for me, but I actually changed my mind at the last minute leading up to the wedding day. During those 5 years of dating, I told H that I would take his name. My name wouldn't drastically change. I would even have the same number of letters.

Then I realized how attached I am to my name. It is part of my identity, and I couldn't part with it. Yes, that means every single part of my name, including that dreadfully sounding middle name. In Chinese traditions, you can identify a generation by their middle name. I share the same middle name with most of my sisters (the youngest being the exception). I feel a sense of belonging and connection with my given middle name. Also everyone in school somehow figured out my full name at some point. I wouldn't be the same without my first, middle, and last name.

So I can't eliminate my middle name. I also can't get rid of my last name either. I feel even more attached to it, and it reminds me of where I came from. I'm sure it can be a common name, but it is rare enough for me (by no means is it equivalent to Smith). If I need to keep all of my names, then what happens to my last name? Do I move it to the middle? Do I add H's name to my last name to make a doubly long last name? Do I hyphenate? So many possibilities!

Well I went ahead and asked H what he thought of my decision. He was on board and fully supported my change of heart. The great thing is that we never fully discussed what I would do with my last name. We only talked about me keeping all of my names. A few weeks later he filled out my information to add to his insurance policy. He decided that I would have two last names. Oye.

I didn't exactly want that either. I wanted to move my last name in the middle name position. Yup, that means I have two middle names. That way I could still keep my identity, and I can share the same last name with our children. No worries. I took an extra step and corrected everything that was possibly wrong with my name, and I did so through the court system.

I went to my court hearing last week, and my name change was approved. I am currently in the process of switching my name on everything possible, and it's a lot of hard work. Every department and company does it differently. So far I have successfully changed my name with the government (social security administration) and my bank. It'll be a long drawn out process, but it is so worth it. I enjoy sharing the same last name with my husband and soon to be Ninja.

Check out other responses from the famous bees themselves over here!

After I Do:
Finances
Changes
Children
Wedding Regrets

After I Do: Wedding Regrets

2011-03-07T20:53:00.004-05:00

After your wedding, what were some of your immediate regrets in regards to the wedding day? Now that time has gone by, do you have different/additional regrets, or do you no longer regret those initial regrets?

Hahaha. Okay I could write a whole book just answering this one question alone, but I will try to keep it shorter (maybe just a short story instead of a novel). I'll start out with a positive statement. I do not regret moving up our wedding day one bit. We had originally planned for an August wedding but moved it up to June so that H's grandmother could attend. Her health was failing, and there was no sure way of knowing if she would be able to attend our August wedding. She passed away in late July. I am so glad she was there. It made so many of our wedding problems worth going through just so that she could see us get married in front of our friends and family.

with H's grandparents on our wedding day
Photo Courtesy of Jubilee Photography

I honestly didn't have any immediate regrets after our wedding day. I just wished that our situation would have allowed us to take a small honeymoon, even if is was somewhat local and only for a day or two. We went straight back to work on Monday and never had time to take a break. Gosh, we only spent a few hours in our hotel room the night of our wedding and spent the rest of our Sunday with his family. Yeah that's not much of a break. H had recently been hired on as a contractor (the day before our court house wedding), and he had to prove himself as a serious employee. Going on vacation not even a week after starting doesn't exactly give a good first impression.

a whole day after being hired as a contractor, H took off to get married

Then all hell broke loose. A few weeks after the wedding we were asked to pay for some expenses incurred at my in law's house during the Vietnamese ceremony. Back up. We paid for every part of our wedding minus the details at our parents' homes. It was their tradition, and I just assumed they would foot the bill. That bill was way smaller than what we had to pay at the reception to feed 170 guests, photography for the whole day, and every single wedding detail on our end. Let's just say that I was not a happy camper. Later my FIL retracted that statement, which was made by my MIL. He knew that it wasn't right to ask us for money. Psh. It wasn't right that we had no financial help either, but I'm not complaining as long as no one asks me to pay them back for wedding expenses. There is much more to this issue, but I will leave that for another post specifically about money.

The very Asian wedding reception (that we 100% paid for) held at the Imperial Inn in Philly.
Photo Courtesy of Jubilee Photography

Then the regrets started to seep in one at a time. Then it pretty much piled up to the point where I just wished I had the wedding I dreamed of, not the wedding my in laws dreamed of for their son. Yeah that wasn't my ideal wedding in any way, shape, or form. I grew up wanting to walk down an aisle in a pretty white wedding dress. I wanted to have a simple backyard wedding with my closest family and friends. I wanted to enjoy the day without stressing out about fulfilling other people's expectations. Well that didn't happen. I ran into issues with my in laws to the point where I had no voice or opinion about my wedding day. To spite them, I actually tossed away the idea of having bridesmaids. Yes, they even had a say in that too. Grrr. It was painful, and I cried so much over every little detail they scrutinized.

Now that 9 months have passed since our wedding, my regrets remain the same. I wish I could have stood up to my in laws. I wish our wedding could have been about us. I wish that everyone could have said good things about our wedding and remember it being a happy day. I wish money was never an issue, and I wish I could have spent it the way we wanted to since we were footing the bill.

On a happier note, I married my soul mate. His grandmother was able to attend. The day was full of surprises, and I was actually very happy how it all turned out by the end of the night. It was considered a success in my eyes, even though I didn't have my dream wedding. Now only if everything could have stopped right there. It would have been perfect in its own imperfect way.

I love this moment. I love my facial expression. I love my husband.
Photo Courtesy of Jubilee Photography

Check out other responses from the famous bees themselves over here!

After I Do:
Finances
Changes
Children

After I Do: Children

2011-03-04T10:29:00.002-05:00

Are/were you and your SO on the same page when it comes to having children (or not)? Have your views on having children (when, how many, etc.) changes since you were engaged or first married? If so, what changed your mind/views/timeline? Bee parents: How did you and your SO decide when you were ready to start trying to have children? Did any specific life events influence your decision?

I am happy to report that H and I were most definitely on the same page when it came to having children. We both wanted little versions of us running around our house. Hehe. The number of children change from time to time. At first we wanted to have 2 kids. Then I drifted towards the "at least 2 kids" side. Right before our wedding H's fortune telling uncle predicted the number of children plus the gender. That's when we liked the idea of having 3 kids (uncle's prediction).

We never actually set a timeline. We just knew that we wanted to get married first (duh!). In all of the years we were dating/engaged, we were also actively preventing. After we got married, we no longer actively preventing, and that's how Ninja came into this world. Hehe. H always wanted to have kids as soon as possible. He wants to be a young dad to be able to enjoy playing with his kids. On the other hand, I wasn't sure if I wanted them as quickly as he did. I think waiting a year after marriage would have given us enough time to soak in married life and enjoy our last hurrah. Well sometimes life doesn't go according to plan. H's fortune telling uncle was insistent on us conceiving in the 60 days following H's grandmother's passing away. It would be good luck for us and our family. I'm not sure why, but at that moment I wanted to start trying within the next month. Sure, it wouldn't be within the 60 days, but I was ready (as if it was magic). No worries. I was already pregnant by the time I had this conversation with fortune telling uncle. Haha.

So we never actually came to a conclusion on when we wanted to have kids. We just made one. It was a pleasant surprise and came exactly at the right time. Although technically you could say Ninja was an "accident." I don't think he was. Instead he wasn't planned, but we never prevented from having him either. He is a very welcomed member to our family, and we couldn't be happier.

Hello, little Ninja!

Check out other responses from the famous bees themselves over here!

After I Do:
Finances
Changes

After I Do: Changes

2011-03-04T09:06:00.002-05:00

How did your relationship change in the first year of your marriage? When comparing day 1 of your marriage to day 365, did you sense any specific/notable changes? If the changes were negative, what were some things you and your SO did to get back on track?

We're inching closer to our first full year of marriage, and we just passed the 9 month mark a few days ago. The biggest change would most definitely have to be the little baby growing inside of me. Other than that, our lives have continued just where we left off the moment before we officially said, "I do."

Adjusting to marriage is something that we spent years doing before we actually tied the knot. We spent 2 years living together under H's parent's roof. Then we bought a house together, opened a joint checking account, and saved up to plan and pay for our own wedding. Marriage is all about team work, and we have been working together for many years. We were practically married in almost every sense before our wedding date. For some, it is against their beliefs. For us, it just worked. It took us years to really get to know each other. Which one of H's habits would bug the heck out of me? Who is responsible for laundry and washing dishes? Who takes care of the finances? What are our plans for our future? All of this was established way before we officially got married. Communication and working as a team is key.

While it is increasingly common for couples to live together before marriage, they still encounter a few changes during the first year of marriage. Why not for us? H asked me to marry him after a whole month of official dating. I said "yes." He said that it wouldn't be official until the day he could put a ring on my finger. Hehe. Pretty much from day one we had marriage on our minds. We couldn't stand the thought of not being together forever. I felt like we were engaged from that moment on, just not officially. That would make our engagement period feel like it was almost 5 years long (it was actually 2+ years). All along we were a unit. It was always "we" and "ours," never "you" or just "me." We were conscious of our future together, and all of our decisions were made accordingly.

I love where we are at in our marriage, and I cannot wait for our new little addition. I'm sure that a family will change our lives drastically. Maybe I'll answer this question again after Ninja is born and see how marriage is affected by a little baby.

My advice for new engaged couples -- don't use me as an example of married life. Marriage requires a lot of hard work, and it's not simply a continuation of your dating relationship. There are a lot of challenges and adventures to face. We were just fortunate to have established a great line of communication and conquered most of our challenges in the 5 years we had been together before marriage.

Check out other responses from the famous bees themselves over here!

After I Do:
Finances

After I Do: Finances

2011-02-25T16:10:00.001-05:00

I'm jumping on the Weddingbee bandwagon, and contributing to the "After I Do" series in my own blogging ways. Enjoy!

On a scale of 1 to 10, how much stress does money put on your relationship? Had it changed since the beginning of your marriage? How do you handle your finances as a couple? What do you think you could do to improve the way you handle your finances?

I would say we're around a 3 and only because I am the one who stresses out about money. Marriage hasn't changed our finances too much, except that I stopped working a few months after the wedding. We had combined our finances when we moved into the house and opened a joint checking account. All along in our relationship my money was his money, and his money was my money. Given, I didn't have much, but we were a unit from the beginning.

The no stress part about money comes from our lack of debt, which is amazing for us at our age. We have paid off our student loans, haven't had a car payment in almost 2 years, and have no credit card debt. Every month we pay off all of our bills, and we still manage to save too. We own every single item inside our home, and it feels good to know that everything is paid off. This is on top of the wedding we paid for back in June, buying H a used car, and getting our roof replaced in August. We still have the mortgage and a loan ($ from down payment of the house) from H's dad to pay off, but that's "normal." Let's just say that we are extremely lucky and smart with our money.

The stressful part would come from having only one income. I'll admit that I didn't actually contribute much to begin with at my old job, but it did allow us to live comfortably (aka save up for a wedding & still be stingy). The big reason why we can do everything on one income is due to H's job and a raise he received last year. It helped us immensely, and we are doing just fine. I am the one who stresses because it comes naturally to me. I have always been a penny pincher (thanks mom), and it's hard for me to believe that we can really live comfortably with just one income. Well we've been doing it for the last 7 months, and we are perfectly fine. Sure, it would be harder if we had a big car payment to make or loans to worry about. Luckily, we don't.

As an improvement, I would love to put more money into savings. That's always a given. With a little Ninja on the way, I want to make sure we have some savings for his future. It also wouldn't hurt to have retirement money either. H contributes to his 401k, and every little bit helps.

I know that we are in a good place in our lives financially. There are many people out there who are suffering in this economy, and we know how fortunate we are. It takes the two of us to make this work, and so far I can say that we're doing a great job.

Check out other responses from the famous bees themselves over here!

Dry Spell But Not a Farewell

2011-02-11T16:03:00.000-05:00

Oddly enough I have returned from my wedding blogging dry spell, but there has been a lack of my own voice here. I have maintained my blogging through the constant inspiration I see in my Google Reader feed. I almost feel bad that I never blogged about the rest of my wedding planning adventure like I had originally planned. It's been 8 months since the big wedding day, and somehow I still can't come around to talking about the day. I enjoy married life much more than wedding planning life. While that is no excuse, I do intend to come back and give a proper recap of my wedding and the planning leading up to it. To organize my thoughts, I will jot down everything that I want to blog about in a notebook, and hopefully that will translate to actual entries in the future. Don't forget about me! I'm married, but I still have a lot to write about before I can say farewell to this wedding blog.

Jubilee Photography

Inspiration - City Hall

2011-02-09T16:51:00.000-05:00

Lauren & Lawrence

Photography by Leo Patrone Photography

Featured on Once Wed

It's pretty obvious how much I love seeing couples getting married without the extra fancy. I can't help but to smile whenever I see pictures like this.

Inspiration - Heart Garland

2011-02-08T17:29:00.000-05:00

Fabric Valentine Hearts Garland Tutorial

from How About Orange

Here is a great tutorial on how to make a Fabric Valentine Hearts Garland that can be a great addition to your wedding decor. It is super cute and fairly simple to make. Imagine how adorable it would look at the cake table or hung up at a bridal shower. <3 I'm going to add this to my list of craft projects.

Happy 8 Months!!

2011-02-02T18:20:00.001-05:00

Dearest Hubby,

Happy 8 month wedding anniversary!! I seem to always forget our wedding anniversary, which is currently documented in months. I hope that we can remember when we hit our first year, but I have a feeling that we might forget. Having celebrated our dating anniversary for the past 5+ years, it is so difficult to adjust to another anniversary that sounds so foreign.

Marriage life is ever so blissful, and I am so super duper happy that we officially said "I do" in front of our family and friends 8 months ago. Honestly, marriage life is very similar to engaged life, which is also very similar to dating life. I am so in love, and I still can't wipe this silly smile off of my face.

Thank you for always being you. Thank you for being my best friend, my soul mate, and my husband. I love you.

Love Always,
Wifey

Inspiration - Elopement

2011-02-02T18:08:00.001-05:00

Raena & David

Photography by Trent Bailey Photography

Featured on Ruffled

Oh I love seeing happy couples getting married without the extra fancy. I had a not so fancy ceremony of my own at the court house, surrounded by close family and friends. It was perfection.

Petal & Print

2011-01-28T13:27:00.000-05:00

Bridal Bloom, 11 inch Wedding Bouquet. $230

Floral Corsage Poppy (6 inch), $45

Floral Headband Yellow, $65

Floral Headband Chambray, $65

Boutonniere, $35

Swoooon! I love the organic feel of the flowers and the gorgeous colors from Petal and Print. The headbands and boutonniere are my favorite. Now only if I could travel back in time and purchase these for my wedding. For now, I will live vicariously through other brides.

Video Friday - I Do!

2011-01-28T11:15:00.000-05:00

The Marvelows - I Do

I am still in love with this song, and I wish I had it on my wedding play list. It's just a fun song that makes you want to get up and dance. Happy Friday!!

Inspiration - Floating Flowers

2011-01-27T13:37:00.000-05:00

Libby & Ben

Photography by Brandon Kidd

Featured on Once Wed

Inspiration - Mustache Bridal Party

2011-01-26T12:15:00.001-05:00

Abigail & James

Photography by Leah McCormick

Featured on Style Me Pretty

I am convinced that everyone needs to have a mustache appearance at their wedding. It can be inside of a photo booth or adorned on the bridal party. Just too much mustache fun!!

Inspiraton - Drifting By Dress

2011-01-25T11:33:00.001-05:00

Kelly & Britian

Photography by Glen Allsop Photography

Featured on Once Wed

*Does the dress look familiar? This was my original idea for a bridesmaid dress that I blogged about in April, but it never panned out as expected. Now that I look back on it, I should have just went ahead and purchased one for each of my unofficial bridesmaids (which just turned into no bridesmaids in the end). All was not wasted because I have this dress in my closet now, and I wore it on our special engagement shoot.

Non-Wedding Related News!!

2011-01-24T13:47:00.001-05:00

This poorly updated wedding blog will be briefly interrupted with a few ounces of cuteness and shocking (or not so shocking) news! I'll start out popular childhood rhyme.

Yin and H sitting in a tree.

K-I-S-S-I-N-G

First comes love

And then comes marriage

Then comes baby in a baby carriage!

....

Yes, you read correctly. We're expecting a baby!!

Details will come soon on my personal blog. Stay tuned!

Inspiration - Tablescape

2011-01-24T11:41:00.000-05:00

Shaylee & Andy
Photography by Joielala Photographie
Featured on Ruffled

The Going, Going, Gown Event!

2011-01-18T11:03:00.002-05:00

Blogging silence has been broken to post about this amazing J.Crew wedding dress sale!! Being a J.Crew bride myself, I cannot help but to stare and be totally amazed. Their bridal collection has only gotten better in the past year, and I wish I could have been fortunate enough to visit their exclusive bridal store in New York City. Select dresses are up to 60% off and very affordable. Yay!!

Embossed Organza Sloan Gown

was $1800, now $720

Silk Chiffon Whitney Gown

was $425, now $200

Silk Cotton Estate Gown

was $1500, now $600

Dominique Gown

was $2650, now $1000

82 Days & I'm Finally Ready!

2010-08-23T12:54:00.000-04:00

It's been 82 days since our wedding, and I think I am ready to tell all. Muahaha. So our wedding was not very easy to plan, and we ran into quite a few bumps in the road. Married life is much better than planning for a wedding life. I want to start my recaps soon so that I can still recall most of the events. I wish I had more time to blog during the process (the procrastination entries do not count). While I do love inspiration posts and lots of pictures in my entries, I have a feeling that most of them will just be words. I hope you guys don't mind.

Let the journey begin!

Video Friday - Country Wedding

2010-08-13T10:07:00.001-04:00

Whitney + Jerod's Country Wedding Trailer from Joe Simon Films on Vimeo.

I fell in love with Joe Simon last year when I first saw Mrs. Kitten's wedding video. I even considered him for my very own wedding, but travel costs would have exceeded our budget. At least I can still admire his work and see him continue to grow professionally. I especially love this video and the music that goes so well with it.

Inspiration - Under Water

2010-08-12T21:03:00.000-04:00

Marc + Cecilia

Photography by Michelle King

Featured on 100 Layer Cake

Video Friday - Dooo, Dooo, I Do!

2010-08-06T09:12:00.003-04:00

How much fun is this wedding? I love, love it!! Everyone is dancing and having a blast. The couple is so stinkin' adorable. This is definitely the kind of video you want to start your wedding weekend with. =)

Max, Margaux, & The Marvelows from Shark Pig on Vimeo.

Check out more of Max & Margaux's wedding on Once Wed! Did you want to listen to more of that song? Yeah I thought you would. Linky linky to "I Do" by The Marvelows!! Check out more of Shark Pig's amazing work!

Wish List - Return Address Stamp

2010-07-31T09:53:00.000-04:00

Return Address Stamp w. Custom Calligraphy

Patricia Muman - Primele on Etsy

$ 59.00

It looks like a simple stamp but look closer. Calligraphy in rubber stamp form!! I lusted over customer return address stamps, especially during the whole wedding planning phase of my life. I just never got around to it, but it is never too late. If you want your chance at one, go enter the You've Got Mail Sweepstakes at ReadyMade!

via Mrs. Penguin on Weddingbee

Video Friday - Rock and Roll Hearts

2010-07-30T14:10:00.004-04:00

Posting will be light for the next couple of weeks. More details later. For the time being, check out this amazing video by Matt Odom (Rock and Roll Hearts) featuring the lovely couple, Mr. & Mrs. Scissors from Weddingbee! It is so unique and crazy wonderful. I love it!

Lauren + JP from Matt Odom on Vimeo.

Ba

2010-07-29T21:27:00.000-04:00

Our wedding was moved up for a very good reason, and I am so glad that we did.

Photo Courtesy of Jubilee Photography

H's grandmother passed away last night surrounded by family. I am not very good with words, especially during this very emotional time. She is in a better place right now, and she will be truly missed.

Post w/ Content! Shocker!

2010-07-17T22:54:00.000-04:00

A whole week of posts? What's gotten into me? Maybe I'm just itching to return to the blogging scene. I'm not quite ready to get back to the full swing of things, but I'll try to keep up with my posts. I have a whole wedding to recap, including the planning & many stories to tell. Don't think that getting married will slow me down. Okay, I'll admit that it did in fact slow me down. The house is still a mess, and wedding stuff is everywhere. Hubby asked me when I would get around to cleaning it up, and I'm just not quite ready yet. It could just be laziness, but I think it's deeper than that. No worries though. H bought me a brand new spankin' laptop*, and it's my portable computing/blogging device. Therefore, there will be more posts to come!

I'll leave you guys with a throw back moment for this weekend's viewing pleasure. This is my cousin's wedding in New York, and I was 6 at the time. Oh to be young and innocent. I actually have a few memories from the day. A bunch of kids made fun of me due to my inability to fully understand the English language (Canto being my 1st language). These kids were Chinese too. Sadness. Well my cousin is all grown up with a family of her own. I'll be visiting them soon. San Antonio, here I come!

Video Friday - "My Wife, No Touch"

2010-07-16T09:08:00.000-04:00

my wife no touch // a civil ceremony with jess and konga from stillmotion on Vimeo.
Stillmotion

Stunning, small, intimate ceremony. Perfection! I especially love the groom! How cute! "My wife, no touch." Hehe.

Inspiration - Vintage Shoot

2010-07-15T11:25:00.002-04:00

Laura and Kenya's Engagement Shoot

Orange Girl Photographs

featured in Style Me Pretty

I am in love with this amazing photo shoot!! It reminds me of an adventurous couple visiting the national parks with their newly purchased vehicle. The natural beauty of the couple and landscape makes my heart flutter. Check out more details and photos from their shoot at Style Me Pretty!

Inspiration - Photobooth by the Sea

2010-07-14T11:25:00.001-04:00

Kaite & Jordan's Wedding

Amelia Lyon Photography

featured on Amorology

Inspiration - Doily

2010-07-13T13:15:00.001-04:00

Crochet Doily

Ashley & Kirk's Wedding

Juliet Elizabeth Photograhy

from Once Wed

Inspiration - Tea Cups

2010-07-12T14:18:00.001-04:00

Floral Tea Cups
Tiff & Leo's Wedding
Photography by Erin Hearts Court
from Snippet & Ink

Sneak Peak -- Wedding Pictures!!

2010-07-07T20:43:00.003-04:00

Go on over to All Things Lovely to see some pictures from our big day! Thank you Kristen & Nic!!

Jubilee Photograhy
06.05.10

Happy Father's Day!

2010-06-20T09:59:00.003-04:00

walking down the aisle & having a good time

all smiles =)

Happy Father's Day!

We're Married!!

2010-06-19T09:25:00.002-04:00

I'm back!!! I have so much I want to tell you! So I did not end up blogging as much as I wanted the weeks leading up to the wedding, but I will most definitely make up for it now that I can look back on the big event. Honestly, I don't even know where to start. Well pictures are always great.. so I'll give you a glimpse of our wedding adventure.. =)

getting ready for our court house ceremony the Wednesday before the big event

surrounded by family

making it official in front of our family & friends!

hehe.. our silly friends

Okay so this wasn't much of a glimpse into our wedding adventure. It was more of a glimpse of how we became legally wed as husband and wife. =)

No worries. There will be more to come!

The Big Day!!

2010-06-02T07:11:00.002-04:00

I'm getting married today!

=)

The next time you see me I will be a Mrs.

Stress

2010-05-30T07:15:00.002-04:00

I am stressed. There are too many contributing factors. I hope I survive to tell my story.

=/

Sneak Peak -- Hair Piece

2010-05-23T12:00:00.000-04:00

While I always had a vision of the perfect wedding dress, I don't think I ever matched that image with a veil. That's a good thing since I won't be getting married the traditional American way. Instead of a veil, I have a pretty hair piece to match that pretty hair of mine. Haha. Who am I kidding? Who cares about my hair? It's all about the flower! Take a look...

Veneta by Myra Callan
Twigs & Honey on Etsy

*swoooon*

Featured!! We're Famous!

2010-05-22T15:50:00.001-04:00

Haha. Okay, we're not exactly famous. We're just super cool. =)

All Things Lovely: Saturday Afternoon
Photography by Jubilee Photography

Thanks, Kristen! You are amazing!

A Talk with my Dad

2010-05-16T08:33:00.000-04:00

The wedding has been stressful, and I'll admit that I am an emotional mess. Don't all brides reach that stage? Weddings are supposed to unite two families, and yet I feel like I'm drifting further apart. There are days when I want to have no part in the wedding due to my in laws demands. Maybe it's because I was told by FFIL that I am not an American or that FMIL once told us to stop thinking like Americans.

Take a step back. Wait. I am an American, an Asian American. I am damn proud of my rights as an American born citizen. Sigh.

So I sink back and think of not so happy thoughts. My dad called me last night. I vented a little about the wedding, and he listened and understood. My parents expected all of this to happen. My dad said that I can't win the fights, and there's nothing worth fighting about. It's a one day event, and it's difficult for his parents to understand our views. They are trying to instill as much of the old traditions as possible. I told my dad that H's sister will probably have the wedding of her dreams. He said that will most likely be true. We're the guinea pigs right now, and it's never fun to be the experiment.

One of my biggest fears resulting from this wedding is that I will hold a grudge against H's parents. My dad holds grudges too. I think that's where I get it from. I told him about the big ordeal behind us purchasing our first home, and his parents were not very happy with our decision at first. My dad told me that they value different things than we do and that we are very fortunate to have a place of our own. My parents have been fully supportive of our purchase since the day I mentioned it to them, but I can't say the same for his parents. I don't think I will be able to get past what happened with the house ordeal, and I will always remember how they treated us. While I don't want to get into the details, it wasn't very pleasant. Will this wedding be the same? Most likely. I don't want that to happen, but it's probably too late.

I told my dad about the court house ceremony, and he was excited. He is definitely on board to attend, and honestly I couldn't be happier. After a "I'll come if you want me to come" response from FFIL, I was expecting the same from my parents. Maybe it wouldn't mean as much to them because Saturday is the big event. Who cares about the legal ceremony? Well my parents do, and they will be there. =)

Today our parents meet again. They met once before at Thanksgiving. It was an awkward interaction. By awkward, I mean there was very limited interaction. My parents spoke with the one person in H's family who is very much Chinese. Now that they won't have her to cling to, I'm afraid this next meeting with turn disastrous. I'm always afraid of what my parents think of H's parents. Don't get me wrong. H's parents are very good people (subtract the house & wedding fiasco from the equation), but they don't have the same values as my parents. The subject involves a few more sentences to make sense, but I think I'm rambling on right now. Basically, this meeting will be an interesting one. I have been fearing this day for the past week, and now that it's finally here, I want it to be over with pronto. At least my parents will be by my side, and I'll have their support.

Sometimes I get caught up in every detail that bothers me. It's hard not to. I just have to take my dad's advice. *takes a deep breath*

My daddy & I conquering the Great Wall of China, and we're at the very top!!
He's my hero.
04.07.09

The Non-existent List...

2010-05-08T08:05:00.000-04:00

Since the wedding is quickly approaching, there is always something to do everyday. As each task gets crossed off the to do list, I feel a sense of accomplishment. Okay about that to do list... I don't have one. Shhh. It's a secret.

I've been meaning to make one for months now, but I fear the stress that it might induce from the sight of it. That's probably not a very good reason because the day is quickly approaching, and I have tasks to add to my non-existent list. Instead of physically adding it, I make sure to tell H to make a mental note too. Two individuals with the same mental note might bring out the possibility of at least one of us remembering down the road. Oh the big chances I take!

Maybe if I recruited some help, then that to do list wouldn't be so overwhelming. I'm just not sure where to start with the asking for help part. There is a sense of guilt that comes with asking. I've never been the type to want help, and I'll spend hours by myself performing a task rather than asking for assistance. Luckily it's different for H, and I ask for his help all the freaking time. I'm sure he hates it. = p I've had some great friends come over to lend a hand (or let's make that two) on making the wedding favors. It's one of the biggest, most unrealistic goals I have for this wedding. I thought I could do it on my own the whole time, and now that we're weeks away, I know that is impossible. Even with my friends helping, I doubt it can actually happen, but I'm certainly going to try. Now that's where it stops. I can't get myself to ask for more or even think of how people can help.

"If there's anything I can do to help..."

I should really jump at the chance to say "yes" immediately with no hesitation. It would really help speed this process. I have no idea what kind of help is out there for me. The biggest help? A non-defective clone. Muahahaha.

being cool, calm, and using that peace sign --- maybe this will help reduce the stress & push us to write down a list already

Wedding Break Down

2010-05-04T12:56:00.000-04:00

We had a serious talk with H's parents this weekend, and it was not a pretty one. I was going to put this entry on the back burner, thinking that my frustration would subside in a few days. I'm sure it won't.

I've realized that this wedding really has nothing to do with us. It has everything to do with family and upholding Asian tradition. Weddings are never easy because there is an obligation to make everyone happy. The most well known advice out there is that you can't make everyone happy. H & I are Asian. We have to respect our families. We have no choice but to listen, be verbally abused, and follow direction. This is how the wedding turns into a day about the families, not the couple. Is it even about uniting two families? Not really. It sounds like a big family reunion. I would rather not attend.

Compromises. I've given up so much to make this wedding the day everyone else wants. What did I give up?

purchasing the perfect girly white wedding dress of my dreams & wearing it for every second possible -- instead I have to wear 3 dresses, none of which are dream worthy
walking down the aisle with a bouquet in my hand and my dad by my side
sharing the moment of "I do" with 0ur family and friends -- I get to do this at the court house with 2 witnesses instead
having bridesmaids who care & share the excitement -- instead I have some awesome friends who really make up for it
small intimate wedding -- turned into big family reunion
the excitement of planning the big day -- turned into dread & having to face reality
wanting the perfect balance of an American wedding with Asian traditions -- no balance, just Asian

What does my family think about all of this? I've been known to rant about how crazy and dysfunctional my family can be. Oddly enough, I think they are super awesome. They have been supportive through this whole planning process, and I sense a bit of excitement on their end. The only request they have made is to invite a few of their friends, most of which were already on my guest list.

With a month remaining, I've given up again. How can I keep my head up when I am dreading every moment of this? I can't.

Engagement Inspiration

2010-05-03T20:50:00.000-04:00

Engagement photos. Two people truly, madly, deeply in love and captured in a photographer's lens. Beautiful!

Stacie & Geoff
Photography by Sloan Photography
from Snippet & Ink

Leanne & Jacob
Photography by Wildflowers Photography
from Green Wedding Shoes

Mr. & Mrs. Canary
Photography by Yvonne Wong
from Weddingbee

Jessica (What I Wore) & Adam

Photography by Tiffany Arment Photography
from Ruffled

Christina & Matt
Photography by Caroline Tran

Audrey & Ken
Photography by Sarah K. Chen

Maria & Alvin
Photography by Amelia Lyon

Sarah & Chris
Photography by Jubilee Photography

Courtney & Nick
Photography by Anne Ruthman

Glory & Avery
Photography by Punam Bean

Our Parents

2010-05-01T09:35:00.000-04:00

My parents get married in Hong Kong!

and strike a pose with the posse -- my family =)

H's parents get marred in Vietnam!

In celebration with their families. Yay!

H and I would not be who we are without our parents, and I'm going to pay a little tribute to them at the wedding. Details are up in the air, but I have a few ideas in that little brain of mine. =p

Playing Catch Up

2010-05-01T09:01:00.000-04:00

Life has been hectic this past week, and I am playing catch up... big time. Ready for the big news? I guess you have to be if you're reading this.

We moved the date up to June 5th! Eeeeeks! *cues freak out mode*

I have pretty much turned into a crazy woman, and I am trying my very best to cross off as many things on our to do list everyday. Remember I'm the girl who lived with the thought of "if I don't think about this wedding, then I can pretend it won't happen." Yeah. Well it's definitely happening, and it's happening over 2 months earlier than expected. The new date was decided last Sunday, and we're a month away from the big date. Wowzers...

So let me back up and explain why we made such a crazy decision. It does make a lot of sense, just not to our sanity. H's grandparents' health has been declining for the past two or three month, and we're afraid that they may not be able to attend if their health worsens. It means a lot for us to move up the date to increase the possibility of them attending. I don't want to live with any regrets. I know that if I wait for August to come around, I will feel guilty that I just stood there and didn't do anything to make the situation better. It's a pretty extreme decision, and I was the one who brought it up to H. He agreed. We spoke with his parents. They agreed. I later talked to my parents, and they agreed too. It just makes sense to us right now. If something were to happen to either one of his grandparents, there would be no wedding this year. I don't mind pushing the wedding back another year or even two. I just want to do everything in my power to make sure they can be there.

Before H and I were engaged, his grandparents would sometimes tell us to get married now so that they can be there for the wedding. They were not getting any younger, and maybe we should have pounced at the opportunity. No worries. We'll get married ASAP.. on June 5th.

Ba & Ong - Christmas 2006

Since I have the big news out of the way, it's time to continue planning. Next up... maybe engagement photo inspiration? The big dress reveal? Just kidding. I did buy three wedding dresses, and I tried each one of them on yesterday at work. That was fun. =) Stay tuned.

Wedding Bands - Check!

2010-04-27T22:14:00.000-04:00

I just received my wedding band in the mail today, and it is gorgeous! Take a look...

Channel Set Diamond Eternity Ring
from Blue Nile

In the midst of entering "freak out" mode, my Real Simple wedding magazine reminded me that we needed to purchase wedding bands. Duh! Just imagine silly Yin waiting until the week before the wedding to remember that super big detail. Luckily I did some research a month or so back, and I found the Channel Set Diamond Eternity ring from Blue Nile. With a width of 2mm, it was bound to match my engagement ring. Don't remember it? Oh yeah... I never showed you guys! Well here it is...

photo was taken prior to reading this awesome post by the talented Anne Ruthmann

My engagement ring + super awesome wedding band = match made in ring heaven. It doesn't hurt that the band came in the mail less than 48 hours after I ordered it. It also doesn't hurt that I fit the smallest size they offer online. Muahaha!

Oh yeah I don't think I ever told you guys about the story behind my engagement ring. It's a pretty long one, and I've hinted at there being very limited time to get this wedding planning underway. I guess that will be a story for another day.

What about H? He was set on getting a tungsten carbide wedding band. Don't know much about tungsten carbide? Wiki will tell you all you need to know. His band looks a little something like this...

Matisse Tungsten Carbide Wedding Ring
from Tungsten World

H's band was not an easy purchase compared to mine. At first he was set on a simple ring like this...

Classique Tungsten Wedding Band
from Tungsten World

Well I made him second guess himself and get something more "techie." The Classique is maybe a little too classic. That's where the Matisse comes in and takes over. I think it would compliment H very well with the extra edge in style. We actually went to the mall last night to get a better idea of what size to order, and the jewelry store had a few tungsten carbide wedding bands on display. It helped give us a better visual and understanding of H's needs. He has short fingers. Short fingers = smaller width needed for the band. =)

So there you have it folks. The weddings bands have been crossed off our to do list. Now let's see what's next...

Drifting By Dress

2010-04-26T21:43:00.000-04:00

Drifting By Dress by Burlapp
from Anthropologie

Drifting By Dress by Burlapp
from Anthropologie

Drifting By Dress by Burlapp
from Anthropologie

I am in super speed mode, and I found this dress at Anthro today. It looked super cute on the hanger, and it looks even better on a human body. The color is neutral, and there are so many ways to dress it up. I hope my unofficial bridesmaids will like it. I'll be back in the store later this week to pick up the rest of the dresses.

While I wish I could explain more, I am on a time crunch. Don't know what I'm talking about? Yeah I don't even have time to write an entry about it. Okay I really do have the time. I'm just lazy. I'll whip something up later tonight.

The point of having a wedding blog is to track my planning process. I'll admit that I didn't do much planning prior to last night. Yup, you read that correctly. So even though there is not enough time in the world to plan this wedding, I'm still going to continue to blog. Heck, I'll be blogging more than ever now. Just watch me. =p

Not Like Most Gals

2010-04-11T17:04:00.001-04:00

I think most girls look forward to getting married and celebrating with a fairytale wedding. I don't think I can be categorized with most girls at this point. Why? I've been going out with H for almost 5 years and engaged for 2 years. I've lived with H for the past 2.75 years, and I plan on living with him forever. We recently bought a house together and enjoy most aspects of married life. What's missing? Just the marriage certificate and the tax benefits. Sure, we would love to start a family together soon, and it's only acceptable to be married first only by standards. When have I ever followed the standards? Exactly. =) Okay, honestly I would probably follow tradition and get married before babies enter the picture. I can't scare people away too much.

Am I missing out? Probably. There is something special about the excitement of marriage and planning a wedding. I may never experience it, and it saddens me to think about it. Then I'll get over it knowing that I get to spend forever with my soul mate. *smiles*

H + Yin = Awesome

Being Reminded

2010-04-03T10:56:00.001-04:00

08.14.10

This week has been a constant reminder of that day above. So I think I can hide and make it go away? Well that's what I thought, but I guess that's not always possible. I am just very lucky to be surrounded my awesome people who are oh so sweet and caring. Thanks guys!

I have scheduled an engagement session with our photographer for early May. Thank you, Kristen, for being on top of it! I'm more excited about the photo session than most elements of wedding planning. That's okay though. One step at a time. I can't easily get back into the swing of stressing and planning. I might as well enjoy the small parts of it. *smiles*

I also talked with two great friends back to back this week, and they have given me great insight into the family aspect of this wedding. There are many traditions that we are expected to uphold, and that may be the most stressful part of the planning. How can I possibly make this day perfect without being so overwhelmed by family requests? Well I haven't found the answer quite yet, but I'm working on it.

Btw, I'm going to have awesome cake for this wedding. Thanks awesome baker-who-shall-remain-anonymous-for-the-time-being! Even if all plans fall apart, I'm eating my cake (all three of them) and having my photographer take a picture of it. Score!

from Keep Calm Shop on etsy.com
$14.95 for 13x9 print

Oh boy.. here it goes...

2010-03-24T20:19:00.000-04:00

Since it's been eons since I last updated, I might as well refresh my own mind of what's been going on.

April 2009 - engaged
May 2008 - introduction to Weddingbee = daily eye candy
October 2009 - a wedding date is chosen (not by us, by the people who have almighty knowledge of lucky days)
November 2009 - parents finally meet
December 2009 - restaurant/reception is reserved
January 2010 - panic
February 2010 - cake & photography taken care of

I think that's pretty much where we left off. In all honesty, I've been bogged down by this wedding. I don't want it. There you go.. I said it! Yes, I want to marry H. I want to have a wedding to join us as husband and wife. I just want my vision of the big day, not our family's vision of it *cough*his family*cough*. That's what girls want after all, right? This is the day that little girls dream of when they're young and heavily influenced by Disney characters. I am no different. I might not want to be Cinderella on my wedding day, but I sure do want to feel like a princess. I don't need the big, expensive fancy dress. I don't need a million people in attendance. I just want it simple and a celebration of us, not everyone else.

Remember this Save the Date reminder? (not the actual STD)

I have Save the Dates that are ready to be sent with postage and all. Guess where they're at? It's in my desk drawer, and I won't let them come out. I figure that if I don't send it, then I can pretend that the wedding doesn't have to happen. That's wishful thinking on my part. We've had the Save the Dates for a month. They're supposed to be sent out 6 months in advance, and it's the less than 5 month mark. Along with Save the Dates collecting dust, I've stopped thinking about the wedding altogether for the past month. I refuse to think about it because I get stressed out beyond belief. It is horrible, and I will not face my problems. I want to push back all wedding related thoughts into a dark corner and never have to revisit them. It's my solution. Okay it's not a very good one.

So what's the first thing a normal person (emphasis on normal) do in my situation? Talk to the future Hubs, right? Well I've done that on numerous occasions. I even remember breaking down last summer because I just realized that this was not the wedding I wanted. The conversation/argument consisted of him telling me that this is his vision of the perfect wedding day, and I can't do anything about it (slight exaggeration). This is what his family wants. What about my family? My parents are the total opposite, and they only request that a few people be invited on top of the very small guest list for my side of the family. What about having a very Chinese/Vietnamese wedding? Oh they'll go along with it, but they have not pushed a single thing on us.

Let's pretend that I'm a normal person again. I have brought up the wedding topic numerous times since, and I just end up frustrated with tears. The answer is always the same. He'll try to accommodate, and I'm never satisfied. I have to hear about the next new thing his parents want to bring up, and I try to hide in my corner. It's a painstaking process, and I think I've given up.

Here's an example. His parents mentioned bridesmaids, and his mom wanted me to have my bridesmaids try on Vietnamese traditional dresses (Áo Dài). Her friend was going to Vietnam in a week, and I needed them to come to the house asap. Of course they also tell me that H's sister cannot be in my bridal party due to Chinese traditions. Umm.. hello, I'm the Chinese one. Can't I decide what traditions I want and do not want to include? I'll take the chances and have an unlucky marriage just so that H's sister can be my bridesmaid. Well it gets worse. I tell her that my best friend Brippy is in New York, and there's no way she can get fitted. Oh okay, then let's consider her out of contention. Yup, that's right. My best friend was nixed because of that. What about my little sister? Well she's 14 years old, and I don't really get along with her. So it makes no sense at all that his parents would suggest for her to be my Maid of Honor.

I participated in a Vietnamese wedding in Dec 2007. I wore a Áo Dài at the request of H's mom, and I was fine being a guest at a Vietnamese wedding. This wedding also had bridesmaids wearing their normal coordinated American dresses. Sigh.

Get this.. we're not even having a traditional American, walk down the aisle ceremony due to time constraint and no one is even recognizing the need for one (except me). So my question is why do I need bridesmaids at all? So I'm putting up a fight. They've asked again, and I have told H's parents that I don't need them. Their response? "Well then you'll have a Maid of Honor then?" Nope. Nada. I don't think they took that too well.

So this is just one example of the stress I have to deal with. In that example alone, I have introduced my lack of a bridal party and American ceremony. It sucks. This wedding sucks. I have lost all of my excitement because this isn't the wedding I ever dreamed of.

What is my dream? I just want a small intimate wedding with our closest family and friends. I want to get married in the court house in the morning and have a small get together at the house to celebrate at night. I want it in the backyard, and I want our guests to have a good time. I want to emphasize that this day is about the celebration of our union and love for one another. Traditions are sometimes meant to be broken. Weddings are unique. No two weddings should ever be alike because no two sets of couples are ever alike. We're all unique. Weddings can incorporate traditions and also start new ones.

Jess & Mike's Vintage City Hall Wedding
www.oncewed.com

Is that too much to ask for?

The Story of Us - A Side Note

2010-02-20T08:44:00.000-05:00

There's a bit of information that you might want to know before I continue much longer. I was in a relationship at the time. *shock* I had been going out with the guy for quite some time, over a year in fact. It wasn't the healthiest of relationships. Actually it was bad, very bad. I just didn't see it at the time because I was young, and I had no experience being in a relationship. I thought they were supposed to be that way, but boy was I wrong. Even though it wasn't a very healthy relationship, I was committed. I saw H as simply a new friend.

Now you might think I'm the worst person ever because we all know how this story will end. H and I will end up together, and there will be this one poor fellow who got screwed over. To this day I have been unable to forget and forgive the other guy. He hurt me in ways I never knew until I was out of the relationship. I try not to think about the past anymore because I can't change it. I don't think I would want to change it either. I am able to value and appreciate H in ways that I would be unable to without my past.

Everything happens for a reason. You don't have control over destiny. It just happens in a blink of an eye. I am very fortunate to have met my soul mate, especially at a young age. Sure, I wish I had met him earlier because I really don't know how I was able to live without him for all those years. I wish that it could have been less complicated, that no one had to get hurt. These are things that I have no control over now. I could have stayed with the other guy, continued to be unhappy, and just wish for a better future. I didn't do that. I chose myself. I was selfish because I ultimately wanted happiness and destiny to take its course. I'm glad I did because I have no regrets.

This was difficult for me to write because I wanted to make sure this part of the story was told. Maybe that's why I rarely go into details about how H and I met. I feel like a liar if I just mention all the pretty details, but that's all that people want to hear. This is the truth. I'm not exactly proud of it, but I want to be honest about my past.

Gadgets & Projects

2010-02-10T08:33:00.000-05:00

I'm happily snowed in today, and that means I'll be working on wedding projects all day. Yay! Let me show you around my workshop and some of the gadgets.

Fiskars Squeeze 1 inch circle punch, Martha Stewart's doily lace punch, and double happiness paper punch

I love this punch!! I saved up money and coupons and patiently waited to buy this from the store. I'm probably a little pathetic, but I love the beautiful edge.

I bought this pretty number in Hong Kong and was totally inspired by Mrs. Hot Cocoa. I actually ran into it twice, and I regretted not getting it the first time. My dad pretty much persuaded me to go ahead and buy it, especially since everything was 10% off in the store. I paid $5.50 US.

I found my wedding colors at Staples. Haha. Seriously, I did! I wanted a easy source for my paper, and Staples was the only place that even came close. I was conflicted at first, and I finally went ahead and bought one ream of 20lb paper in Salmon and one ream of 120 lb card stock in ivory.

Why salmon? I had a little bump in with salmon about five months ago at Michael's. I purchased about $20 worth of Martha Stewart card stock and matching salmon leaf print (on super duper sale). I had visions of a salmon wedding back then, and the salmon at Staples pretty much called out to me. The two on the left were purchased from the retired Martha Stewart line of papers, and the two on the right are from Staples.

All punching devices + wedding paper = awesome wedding projects to come! The middle double happiness circle will be turned into stickers with my awesome xyron.

Tissue paper flower against a salmon backdrop. This was my test run using white tissue paper purchased for cheap around Christmas time. I have vanilla tissue paper in queue for the final result.

Here's a sneak peak of something I'm working on...

Here's another peak. Imagine all of these pieces of papers turning into my wedding favors. It's going to be insane, but I like challenges.

Haha.. this is just a small glimpse inside my craft workshop. Tune in for more gadgets! =)

*All photos taken by H with the first group using his light box on the cheap (cardboard box, tracing paper, and white poster paper).

P.S. I switched my blog colors to reflect my salmon colored wedding! Muahahaha!

Online Shopping -- So Enticing!

2010-02-07T13:18:00.000-05:00

After a long day of shoveling snow, it's time to relax and recover from all the aches. There are quite a few sales going on around the Internet, and it's hard not to stop and stare. Here's just a few...

Twigs & Honey by Myra Callan

Myra Callan is offering a 25% discount on all items in her online shop through this weekend only. It excludes her amazing Etsy and custom order pieces, but it is super amazing. Now if only I could afford her pieces even with the discount. Enter discount code at checkout: kisses

Wedding Invitations, Gifts, and Stationery by Hello Lucky

With the launch of Hello Lucky's newest line of vintage-inspired and wedding stationery printed on 100% recycled paper, they are celebrating by offering Weddingbee readers 20% off all products. To take advantage of the 20% off discount, simply enter the code BEEMINE2010 upon checkout. This offer is valid through 2/14/2010. I have my own set of Hello Lucky invitation samples, and they are really dreamy in person. Now only if I could spend my whole budget on invitations. Hmm...

Hello Lucky Save the Date Postcards

I am especially drawn to their new line of Save the Date postcards. I love how the announcement is off to the side and kept simple and sweet.

Since those are way out of my budget, I figured I would keep looking online for swoon worthy wedding related products. I stumbled across Modcloth through one of those Facebook ads. Now I've heard about Modcloth around the Internet (check out What I Wore), so it's nothing new to me. I just never clicked on the site before, and once I did, I was immediately drawn. Of course I found a great dress, and I bought one for myself. How could I not? I deserve a little present for all of that hard work from yesterday. =)

Wildlife Photographer Dress

Wouldn't you know it... I just wrote this whole entry and figured out that I should probably cancel my order. Why? I just read the reviews, and it doesn't look pretty. Sigh. I'm in the process of figuring out how to cancel it before it gets processed. Oh man. I was so excited about it too. I originally had visions of this dress for an engagement shoot, bridal shower, or rehearsal dinner. It is super cute in the back, and I am drawn to dress pockets. Oh well. This will be a lesson for me not to order immediately out of excitement without reading the reviews.

On a happier note, I did buy something else wedding related. Details will come as soon as shipping has confirmed. The company that I purchased it from has been known to cancel orders. =/ I'm crossing my fingers on this one because it will be perfect for the wedding. I really hope it ships out and arrives this week.

Preview - Ring Shots

2010-02-07T11:59:00.001-05:00

As a result of finding tracing paper on sale at Staples, Hubby decided to make a cheap light box. He was experimenting with shots, and I adore the ring shots above. I should probably find a way to incorporate Hello Kitty into the wedding. Muahaha. ;-)

Speaking of rings, the recycle trash can almost ate mine up on Thursday evening. Our recycle trash can is actually bigger than a normal trash can because I'm awesome and requested the biggest one they have. Well my ring slides around on my finger a lot in the winter since my hands are so cold. It's the total opposite in the summer when my fingers swell up from the heat. Well as I was throwing in some plastics and paper, I heard the thump of my ring fall in. That has never ever happened to my ring before, and I freaked out. H came to the rescue and found it immediately. Phew. Just imagine if I didn't hear the thump and let the trash man take my recyclables with my ring in there. I do have insurance on my ring, but it has so much sentimental value. It's not replaceable, and you will soon know why as soon as I tell you guys the story behind my ring. =)

Going in the Right Direction

2010-02-02T21:42:00.000-05:00

I'll admit it. I freaked out like no other this past weekend.

rawr!

I can honestly say that I have improved quite a bit since then, and I have accomplished a few small things on my very big to do list. Since I'm a big fan of lists, I will present to you a list of my small accomplishments:

contacted a few (as in 2) photographers and am in the process of making a pro and con list for each
ideas for finding an affordable DJ & wedding cake using networking connections of sorts
save the date sketch is made and the project is ready to go
finalized on the wedding colors (after going back and forth on a daily basis and incorporating new color schemes every other day)
bought a super duper printer for all of my wedding printing needs
browsed through craft stores for the perfect shades of paper goods (which I later found at Staples of all places)

I'm still a very stressed out Yin, but I'm going to make it through one baby step at a time.

The Story of Us - Part I

2010-01-31T09:19:00.000-05:00

Call me crazy, but I never did introduce you guys to the story behind From Poke to I Do. Sure, I made some lame entry to make the blog go forward, but there are details to be shared. =)

How did H (that will be his new name) and I meet? The simple answer would be in school. The not so simple answer goes a little like this...

I just completed my freshman year of college, and I took on the challenge of taking summer session. As a new sophomore with less than a year under my belt, I took the one class that required my sophomore status -- accounting. I almost dropped the class because I wanted to take a tiny break from classes and exams to enjoy my summer break. Who wants to take accounting when they can be lazily enjoying the summer sun? Exactly. Why didn't I? I was simply too lazy.

meet Yin

H would have just completed his senior year of college and graduated in May, but he didn't. Life happens. He needed to take two more courses to be an official graduate, and there he was inside Student Services trying to pick his two courses. Economics would be an easy one since he needed it for his degree. Then there was the elective, a class of his choosing. Upon his uncle's advice, he chose accounting of all things. Apparently it's supposed to help you in the adult life (really?).

meet H

There we were on the first day of class inside Memorial Hall. I was assigned to my table, along with everyone else in the classroom, except for H. Since he joined last minute, the professor had to randomly assign him to a group on the spot. He sat across from me. There were a total of 4 people in our group, myself included. One would later never return (later as in the next day), and then there would be three. We exchanged our contact information on a sheet of notebook paper, and went on with our day.

meet accounting

Did I notice H? Yes, he was Asian, but that was simply it. Did H notice me? Yes, he sure did. His friends can tell you the story of his instant attraction to me. It's quite funny. =)

So folks, that's how we met -- at the University taking a boring Accounting class. How will our relationship take a change from strangers to friends? You'll just have to wait and see.

meet us - one month later

Cleaning Leads to Wedding Planning, Right?

2010-01-30T00:04:00.000-05:00

After a long week of being an adult (work), I'm ready to kick back and relax this weekend. By relax, I mean clean and try to start this thing called wedding planning. Like any other task at hand, I try to avoid it in every way possible. Remember being a student cleaning your room instead of studying for a big exam? Well that was me then, and this is still me today. The room where I'll be spending many hours planning and crafting has to be perfect in order to inspire an amazing wedding full of great ideas, right? I think so. =)

Seriously, I am going to get down to business. I have to. How many months do I have remaining? Oh yeah, that would be a little over six months. I don't even think I can get a dress ordered in time for an August wedding, especially with alterations (that's if I decide to go that route). That is how far behind I am. Can I even book a photographer in such short notice? Oh man...

*cue panic attack*

How about I continue cleaning and set aside my fears? Yeah, that sounds a lot better.

Somehow I'll turn this mess into a clean room... somehow...

Wedding Reading Material

2010-01-23T07:34:00.000-05:00

I recently bought the following wedding related reading materials:

source: realsimple.com

source: marthastewartweddings.com

source: marthastewartweddings.com

Can you tell that I'm an obsessed Martha Stewart fan? If not, here's another magazine I have in my collection...

source: marthastewartweddings.com

With so many magazines, you would think that I spend my free time reading them. Nope. They've been sitting on the coffee table collecting dust. I recently purchased the Real Simple Weddings upon high recommendations among the wedding community. It's a great magazine with almost no ads, and it is very informative about the whole process of planning. I was tempted to purchase it last year, but I decided to reserve it for this year. While I'm a Weddingbee nut, I try to avoid reading The Knot. In this case, I only had a vague idea of my time line. After opening the first couple pages of Real Simple, I almost had a panic attack. You would think that would make me go into crazy planning mode. Nope. I'm afraid to tackle the big obstacle ahead, and I'm still taking my good old time. This is going to kick me in the butt. I know it.

Goal #1 - Start reading my wedding material and create a strategy. Yes, I think that would be best. I need to keep organized. While I know I need to get x, y, and z done, I don't exactly know the importance of the order.

Goal #2 - Set a budget. With the uncertainty of our income in the upcoming months, that has been a tough one. I was recently talking to Hubby about my budget for the wedding dress. He was thinking thousands of dollars. I was thinking hundreds of dollars (below $500). Of course that really just limits me to alterations on my current $25 vintage find and no room to actually see if there's another dress out there for me. Yes, we definitely need a budget.

Goal #3 - Gosh, I can't think that far ahead in goals! I'll stick with 2 then. Hehe.

Don't Sweat the Small Stuff

2010-01-09T10:40:00.000-05:00

My last post seriously put me in panic mode. How in the world am I supposed to plan a wedding in a mere 8 months? You would think reading 1.5 years of Weddingbee would prepare me for everything to expect. Nope. It probably makes me even more torn between x, y, and z. I see something I love, and I make a mental note to incorporate it. I then fall in love with so many different elements, and they don't all mesh well together. Oh and it doesn't help that I've changed my wedding colors three times. Gahhh!

Then I realized that I shouldn't stress. It'll make me hate wedding planning, and I really should enjoy this process. This will be the one time I can plan a big event and have it *almost end up the way I like it. It's like planning a kid's birthday party on a much bigger scale with a whole lot more food. This should be fun. I will just take my time and breathe every now and then. I will take everything day by day and enjoy the other parts of my life too. What can be better than eating hot pot in our very own living room? Yup, we're awesome. I have to remember to not sweat the small stuff. Yes, a wedding can be categorized into the small stuff. It only takes up one day in our lives, and there are so many awesome days ahead.

Let the Planning Begin...

2010-01-03T21:58:00.001-05:00

Lo siento my blog buddies. I have abandoned you all, and I never meant to stay away for so long. I guess recovering from the blog flu was more difficult than I thought it would be. No worries. I have good news to share, and I hope this will make up for my long absence.

and here it goes...

WEDDING PLANNING BEGINS NOW!

Oh boy, oh boy! We have officially set the date and reserved the venue. Now it's time to focus and plan this wedding in a very short 8 months. How will this be possible? Who knows! The budget is tiny. The time is short. The love is everlasting. Let's get started!

I totally made this up on a whim for this blog entry... it doesn't look too shabby.

Thrifty But Not a Magician

2009-12-05T09:45:00.000-05:00

I'm a thrifty person.. maybe too thrifty at times. I like to find myself a good deal or two (make that every single time I go shopping), and I rarely ever buy anything for sticker price (even at T.J. Maxx or Marshalls). I am a bargain shopper at heart, and maybe that's why I'm going to try to make my $25 wedding dress work. I have to come to the realization that weddings are expensive. I think I have, and that is why I want to push back the date yet again. I can stretch a dollar, but I'm not a magician.

As more family members talk about the wedding, I just want to hide. I'm the only person who does not believe it's going to work with such a tiny budget (which gets smaller by the day). The wedding everyone else wants is expensive, no matter how much you try to cut corners. The wedding I want *emphasis on the word I* is very simple and only involves the closest friends and family. It would be everything I want and even more, but unfortunately I'm the only one with this vision.

Photo Source: Young House Love

Instead of planning, I'm delaying the whole process. Everyone still believes it will happen in August, and I'm going to let them believe. I know it's not that easy, and I will not plan a wedding and be completely broke from it. I'm smarter than that.

Pushing the Date Back...

2009-11-28T23:23:00.000-05:00

Life is constantly changing, and it's hard for it to ever stay the same for too long. A lot of developments have been made on the wedding front, but my mind isn't on the wedding anymore. I'm thinking about pushing it back again. I know everyone is going to think I'm crazy, but it makes sense to me. I'm not sure if I can wait much longer to be legally wed. We might take the plunge and go to the court house on a Wednesday afternoon. More details to come later.

Making a List

2009-11-17T07:26:00.000-05:00

With 9 months of planning ahead of me, I have to set my priorities and actually start planning now. I'm going to have to warn you that I am a professional procrastinator. While 9 months may sound like plenty of time to normal people, I know that I'll probably put off everything for another month or two. To better prepare myself, I'll make a list of some things I should start worrying about now...

Book Restaurant - This one requires a deposit to reserve the date and also a meeting of the parents. I try to avoid wedding talk with my parents, and oddly enough my dad brought up the need to meet Hubby's parents. He suggested dim sum one weekend, and he even added the subject of the wedding into conversation. It was super weird, but I'll take it. I need my parent's help/hook up to book the restaurant, and this may be the perfect opportunity.

Imperial Inn Restaurant in Philly - Photo by Dave H. from Yelp

Come up with new name for Hubby - This is purely for blogging related purposes. I think he deserves a cooler name. Technically "hubby" is not his actual title.. at least not for another 9 months.

Wedding Dress - I need to work quickly and set up an appointment to get my dress altered. I have a seamstress in mind, but she also happens to be in Lancaster. I was too impressed with Mrs. Sushi's alterations, and I think I might just have to give her a call. Since I'm uncertain of how it will turn out, I also need a back up plan. That will consist of going to multiple bridal shops to try on wedding dresses. I just wonder when I'll find the time to go shopping. I'm not so sure I want to do it alone either. =/

Is it possible to transform my vintage dress find into this amazing Monique Lhuillier sketch? I think it's worth the try.

Save the Date & Wedding Invitations - I know I'm probably crazy, but I think I'm going to try to DIY my invites. It needs to be extra special with a dash of my creativity in the mix. I don't think I can settle for normal or expensive invitations. The STDs will be my first attempt at a DIY project for the wedding, and it'll be a test as to whether or not I can handle it. I need to start brainstorming pronto!

Do you remember these kusudamas? Well I ended up buying a lot of the paper I used for the kusudama on the right, and I'm going to find some way to incorporate that into the invites and STDs.

While the to do list for the wedding will never end until the actual wedding day, I will need to keep myself somewhat on track. Hopefully I can tackle some of the tasks above and get prepped for this planning thing.

Having a Date...

2009-11-15T08:51:00.000-05:00

There is something about having a wedding date that makes this wedding feel very real for the first time. It also sets a deadline for me, and it's also a very scary deadline too. In the year and a half that I've been engaged, I didn't actually think that the day would come. You know.. when the date is set and I have no other choice but to plan and stress until the wedding. It's kind of sad to leave the carefree side of being wedding obsessed (just obsessed with no action). I have a feeling that this planning process will be stressful and full of conflicts. The process alone coming up with the date was stressful, and I can only see it getting worse in the upcoming months.

I am glad that I'm somewhat prepared for this journey. I've had two sisters go down the aisle, and I saw firsthand a good portion of how heavily involved this process can be. I know how much stuff should cost (well the price 5 years ago), and I know that this can be a very expensive affair too. Weddingbee and many other wedding sites have instilled in me the confidence that I can pull this off. I've gathered so much inspiration, and I am in awe of how brides can put amazing weddings together everyday.

Now I can only hope that people will understand that I have the knowledge and background to get most of the planning done. I know there will be deadlines, and I'm no stranger to pricing in the wedding world. It doesn't shock me like most people. Hmm.. now if only I can convince others that it's "normal" to pay a couple hundred (thousands at times) for a wedding gown.

Oh and Hubby and I will be paying for this wedding with our money. I'm a very stingy and thrifty gal, and I'm going to make every dollar we spend stretch out like no other. While I'm sure Hubby's parents will help us along the way, I really would rather have no financial assistance. It will help me budget the way I want to and spend more in areas where I deem necessary.

Next step - put a deposit for the restaurant. Our date is still available. We just need to go there with some cash monies. Maybe we'll get around to it today. Then this will feel even more real...

Blog Worthy News

2009-11-10T09:12:00.000-05:00

There is some exciting news that I have been meaning to share for quite some time now. We have a wedding date!! Well it's not exactly set in stone, but it on its way to being official soon. FMIL consulted with a family member to determine the luckiest day for our wedding. It was a somewhat bothersome process, which I'll explain in a later post. I'm just glad that we have a date in mind and can work towards getting a wedding planned.

So this wedding date is 9 months away... 9 months!!! Part of me wants to freak out because I am no where near ready to start planning. Then I have to realize that I've been wedding blog stalking for the past year and a half. It should have prepared me for what to expect, right? Well I do know what to expect, and maybe that worries me the most. Somehow we'll make it work. Step one.. book the restaurant. *tries to remain calm*

Oh and there's a second part to this exciting post too! So I think everyone knows how much I adore Weddingbee. Well this post came up in the classifieds, and I jumped at the opportunity. I knew there was a good reason why we live so close to Philly =). I emailed Mrs. Candy Corn as soon as I saw the post on the front page, and I patiently waited a whole weekend for a reply. I usually have no luck with freebee offers, but I guess luck was on my side this time around because we were picked!! After some back and forth conversations via email we scheduled for an engagement photo session for next spring. I am super excited!! I am going to meet a beeeee, and we're going to have our first photo session ever.

I guess you could say that this marks the beginning of the wedding planning process, and you'll see me more often here. I bet you guys have been waiting for my return... haha. Who am I kidding? I only have 2 readers... Hi, Anthony! Hi, Hubby! Hi, Jen! Hi, Brittney... wait, that list turned into more than two in a matter of seconds. Well I'm back, and I'm ready to attack. Be prepared!!

chirp chirp

2009-09-21T21:44:00.000-04:00

Yes, I have been absent but for good reasons. I swear! I celebrated my birthday this past week, and eating at an all you can eat sushi buffet is a great way to start off the celebration.

Hubby and I are also in the process of purchasing a nest of our own. We'll be busy packing in the next three weeks as we get closer to our big move in date.

Plus I've been making frequent trips to one of my favorite stores..

I didn't exactly leave empty handed. I found some good deals, and I could not resist buying some yummy items.

This Martha Stewart Paper Flower Bouquet kit is fabulous! I thought it's pretty stupid of me to pay so much money for tissue paper and a few supplies just to make tissue paper flowers. Well it was on sale, and my 50% off coupon worked on top of the clearance price. I tried it out, and the results are great! I ended up curving the tips before folding them accordion style, and I love how fluffy the flowers turned out. This kit makes 27 flowers!! Yes, 27 amazingly beautiful flowers! I am going to have a flower making party, and everyone is invited. =) If you have some tissue paper laying around, feel free to make some of your own using this tutorial from Matha's website.

Oh and yes, I bought something else too...

I bought pretty Martha Stewart paper on sale for 75% off the original price. I made kusudama flower balls to satisfy my crafty side. This entire project cost me less than $0.94 to make. I used two ginormous pieces of Martha Stewart paper (18" x 18") and cut them into 3 inch squares with my amazing paper cutter. I used 60 squares to make this one ball! 60 is a big number, and this was truly a labor of love. I also glued a piece of ribbon to complete the look. I bought 20 yards of it for $0.10 at Jo-Ann Fabrics last year. I'm cheap, and it definitely pays off.

Then I decided to make another one, and this time I timed it. One kusudama flower ball takes me 2.5 hours to make. Now just times that by 14+, and that's how many hours I spent last December making them for Christmas presents.

Aren't the two of them so cute next to each other hanging in the tree like they're best buds?

I officially call this project a huge success, and I'm getting excited about making more of these for the wedding. I'll be making them in all different sizes in lovely shades of pink, cream, and a lighter green. I'm sure they'll look amazing together.

Since I'll be busy packing and working on craft projects, it might be a little quiet on the blog front. No worries. I'll be documenting all of my crazy adventures, especially everything wedding related. While I'm away, please enjoy some pumpkin ice cream from the Woodside Farm Creamery. It is delicious and makes me super happy. It also makes me look at the camera funny. Hehe.

Joe Simon Wedding Films = Amazing

2009-09-10T18:39:00.000-04:00

I can't help it. I love wedding videography, more than I could ever have imagined. Typically I think of the not so lovely VHS quality of the 90s. Being introduced to wedding blogs has completely changed my mind. Take a look at this...

Kate + James's Cayman Island Wedding Highlights from Joe Simon Films on Vimeo.

That cute couple is Mrs. Kitten from Weddingbee and her husband. Aren't they just adorable? I love the combination of the HD and Super 8mm film. It looks so yummy. Joe Simon is just super talented, and I even heard that he is very reasonably priced.

Also check out their awesome wedding trailer...

Kate + James Caymans Wedding Trailer from Joe Simon Films on Vimeo.

Swooooooon!

Videography:
Joe Simon Wedding Films at http://joesimonproductions.com/
on his very own blog
on Weddingbee
on Facebook
on Vimeo

Good News!

2009-09-10T08:28:00.000-04:00

Scrolling through my old entries, I realized I never did share my bit of good news. I am officially employed, and I have been working for the past 2.5 weeks. How does that translate into wedding terms? That means I can actually start planning this wedding. *happy dance*

After months and months of gathering inspiration and over a year of reading Weddingbee religiously, I can finally make my vision come to life. This means so much to me. You have no idea how long I've been waiting for the "ok" to start.

While I still have quite a bit of planning ahead of me, I will start posting some inspiration and projects to get me through this process. I actually have a solid idea and theme for the wedding, and it's going to be amazing (to me). I hope you guys will enjoy this new chapter in frompoketoido.

Thanks to everyone for sticking around and being patient in my non-planning phase.

4 Years & Counting: Finally at the Beach

2009-09-06T03:55:00.001-04:00

We left off...

stuck in traffic
went outlet shopping!
found some great deals
headed back on the road with the beach as our final destination

We were back on the road after a few hours of shopping, and there were definitely less cars on the road at this time. It was already late in the afternoon, and I felt somewhat guilty for taking so long to get to the beach. That was our original destination after all. No worries. Hubby is awesome, and he totally sees the benefit of our pit stops. =) It still took us some time to get to Ocean City. There are a lot of traffic lights down there, and I'll admit that frustration hit me a couple of times. Luckily I wasn't in the driver's seat.

After spending the day on the road and shopping, we finally arrived at the beach!! We quickly found a spot (after convincing Hubby not to park in one of those expensive parking lots) on the road and walked as fast as we could to Paul Revere's Smorgasbord to see if we made it in time for their early bird special. We did not. All was well once we hit the sand and water.

Since we arrived somewhat late, there were less people around, and that meant we had more fun enjoying the beach experience. I have this fear of water though, and I didn't go very far into the water. On the other hand, Hubby loves the water and goes out quite far. This is the first year with his contacts, and he enjoyed being able to see me from out there. =)

Less people on the beach meant that we could park our sheets right by the water. Sweet!! All of our belongings were within view, and I was able to snap pictures the whole time.

We're silly people, and we like to take silly pictures. That green stuff is celery. Hubby was not much of a fan of that until he found the combination of celery and peanut butter. Yumm! I asked if he has ever tried ants on a log (celery with peanut butter topped with raisins). I think maybe homemade dirt (worms inside crushed oreos) and ants on a log are a Downes thing...

Hubby had this idea of burying me in the sand, but I'm not a fan of sand in weird areas of my body. We stuck with burying just my feet.

The sand was super heavy, and my feet were glad to escape. Hubby did mark my sand grave with my name. How sweet of him!

Burying my feet was not enough, and Hubby was on a role. He wanted to dig deeper, and he was the cutest little kid out there. He eventually found water and could dig no deeper (possibly limited by the length of his arms). An adorable older couple saw his determination to dig to the other side of the world, took a few pictures of their own, and took a picture for us too.

The beach was super fun this time around, and we soaked in quite a bit of sun. No worries. We used spf 70, and I reapplied several times through the day. No burning, tanning, or skin cancer for me (*crosses fingers*). After sitting back and thinking about how great our day had turned out, I was so glad that Hubby suggested making our annual beach trip on our anniversary.

After enjoying our late afternoon on the beach we were getting hungry. Food and board walk coming up next!

Previously:
4 Years & Counting: Shopping on a Friday
4 Years & Counting: Off on an Adventure
4 Years & Counting: Outlet Shopping Pit Stop

Inspiration Board

2009-09-02T08:28:00.000-04:00

from top left to right: lacy paper luminaries, *soft pink roses, paper boat place cards
be calm, *husband & wife
delicate lace cake, ruffly corsage, fresh table setting

*Photographs by the amazing Caroline Tran.

Pinkberry + Wedding = Yummm!

2009-09-02T00:32:00.000-04:00

I <3 Pinkberry... more than I should ever love fro-yo. I cannot go to New York without stopping by for dessert, and it doesn't matter what time of the day it is. Now only if I could serve Pinkberry at my wedding like this super lucky couple. Swooon!

Photography by Caroline Tran

Vintage Made Modern

2009-08-24T23:35:00.000-04:00

OMG... so I was browsing through Weddingbee, and I came across this stunning design from the oh so famous Monique Lhuillier...

(source)

I immediately envisioned my fabulous vintage number (I'll be blogging more about this later), and my heart skipped a beat. I have been trying to brain storm ideas on making my vintage dress more modern, and this is the perfect inspiration. The lace, neckline, and flutter detail perfectly match mine. I am itching to show this to my future seamstress and let her work her magic using this great inspiration from one of my favorite designers. Swoooon!!

Let me remind you of what my dress looks like...

Okay so Monique makes her design look gorgeous and totally fabulous, and my dress just looks old and vintage. It's okay because I paid $25 for mine, and Monique is worth thousands of dollars (way beyond my budget) more. I think my beauty has potential. What do you think?

4 Years & Counting: Outlet Shopping Pit Stop

2009-08-12T15:08:00.001-04:00

In our previous chapter we did the following:

wake up, pack, and drive
traveled down 13, hopped on 1, returned to 13
eating pit stop at Sonic in Dover
joined fellow beach goers in traffic
took an adventurous short cut
then returned back to traffic

Shall we continue?

We left off in traffic, and can you guess what happened next? Yes, we were stuck in more traffic. While this is perfectly normal for a weekend trip to the beach, we didn't want to stick with the norm. We wanted to take a break from being around other cars and stretch our legs a bit. Solution? Shopping!!

Outlet shopping! The Tanger Outlets are conveniently located by Rehoboth Beach, and they have a great selection of stores. Last year we decided to make it tradition to stop by the outlets before getting to our final destination. For us it's a great way to take a break and hopefully return to lighter traffic.

Bathroom, anyone? It's also the perfect rest stop for a bathroom break. Hubby took this picture just as a guy was walking in to go to the loo. For such a well traveled area, I expected the restrooms to be dirty, and I was pleasantly surprised to find them updated and very clean.

We enjoyed playing around with odd merchandise. I guess that's why they end up in the outlets since no one really spends full price on them.

You might remember my earlier post about this dress. It sure was fun to try it on and act like I was actually planning a wedding. Hehe.

Our main shopping goal was to find Hubby some up to date swim trunks, and I think that's our goal every year we travel to the beach. He's super picky, and I can actually understand why. There is a lot to consider when looking for the perfect pair of swim trunks -- elastic or draw string around the waist, zippered or velcro pockets (or even any pockets at all), length, and match-ability. In the end we stuck with his old navy blue trunks and decided we'll try again next time.

Hubby did find some super deals on Haggar No-Iron dress pants at a super low price of $12.99. He usually buys them from Costco for around $20, but he hasn't had much luck there in some time. The Haggar outlet had a great variety of colors, styles, and sizes (29 length is so hard to find normally). Hubby ended up buying three pairs for work. Yay!

I had some luck myself at one of my favorite stores, J.Crew. There was an additional 20% off all clearance items, and I found two tops and a bottom for around $30. I don't think I could ever purchase their clothes at the somewhat reduced outlet price when it's not on clearance. It never beats buying them on sale in store. I have found two items already that I purchased for $15 or less on sale in season, and they had them in the outlets for usually more than double what I paid.

We spent probably a good two hours walking around the outlets to waste time, and boy did we have a great time. It's not often that we get the chance to go outlet shopping, and we try to take advantage of it when we can. The Tanger Outlets actually had some high end new additions, which included Kate Spade (oh how I adore their shoe collection), Michael Kors, Cole Haan (another favorite), Kenneth Cole, and even BCBG. We will definitely be back next year.

With another pit stop crossed off of our to do list, it was time to head back on the road again. Will Hubby and Yin ever get to the beach? Stay tuned to find out!

Previously:
4 Years & Counting: Shopping on a Friday
4 Years & Counting: Off on an Adventure

Inspiration

2009-08-12T11:26:00.000-04:00

from left column to right column
cake from Sweet & Saucy Shop, lighting, lettuce table setting, seating cards, Mrs. Cupcake's candle lit cups, and the gorgeous couple Mr. & Mrs. Glitter

Bella Figura Sample Sale!!

2009-08-11T11:10:00.001-04:00

Remember when I blogged about sweet letterpress invites? Well you can get your hands on your very own letterpress sample now through August 31st at a reduced price of $1 per sample with free shipping. These babies originally retail for $5, and Bella Figura is quality letterpress in my book. I find myself drooling over their invitations on a weekly basis since Cynthia blogs for Weddingbee Pro.

Why is Bella Figura holding a sample sale? It is to benefit the organization American Forests, and all proceeds will be donated to the cause. Isn't that great? Bella Figura is an eco-friendly letterpress shop, and they use 100% cotton (tree-free) paper. 1% of their sales are donated to environmental causes. Now that's a great company!

What are you waiting for? Head over to Bella Figura and order some samples! You'll get your one chance to touch and appreciate the amazing-ness that is known as letterpress, and it's for a good cause. Don't mind me as I start drooling over Bella Figura's fabulous invitations...

Dolce designed by Amy Graham Stigler

Plume by Amy Graham Stigler

Dewdrop designed by Bella Figura

Cartoccio designed by Ian Koenig

via little white book

Blogging About Wedding Planning

2009-08-07T15:13:00.000-04:00

For the past few weeks I have been consistently blogging. It brings a smile to my face, and I enjoy the process so much. It keeps my spirits lifted, and life is swell when I can blog about it. Sometimes I wonder why I didn't start blogging sooner. Then I remembered why. I just had to take that leap to escape my past and start new.

This wedding blog has been in the works since I first started reading Weddingbee back when Hubby popped the question. Why not mix my love for blogging and weddings together? While I wanted to start right away, I knew that I couldn't. We did not plan to get married until we were financially stable, and a summer 2009 wedding did not sound feasible. We were right. It definitely was not feasible, and now we just have to push it back to summer 2010... or do we have to push it back even further? I'm pessimistic. I don't think it can happen next year, but I know that somehow it has to happen in order to make everyone happy.

Then that brings me back to blogging. Sometimes it saddens me to blog about weddings when it's so far away. I was reluctant to blog when I was first engaged because I knew that a wedding would be in the distant future. There was no use to blog so quickly with no intention of actual planning, except for in my dreams. Will I just keep blogging about my dreams and inspirations? I have no real wedding planning experience. I feel like I'm a fake.

I wonder if any of my inspiration will eventually come to life? The wedding that is destined to happen isn't my dream wedding. I guess it never was to begin with. I just accepted it because I knew that there was no way around the traditional Chinese/Viet wedding. I'll get into more details about that later.

Should I continue blogging about weddings? Yes, I think I should. While it may be a year (or maybe even two) away, I need to blog to keep sane. Life doesn't always go according to plan, and this wedding probably won't go according to plan either. At least I can keep track of my inspiration, experiences, and feelings on my blog. Maybe I'll even have a few people following this site (shout out to the one person who is following me -- He and She Reviews) who might even like my posts. So I guess I'm here to stay. =D

[Edit] I just checked on Google Reader and happily saw that I have 4 subscribers!! Yay! My combined viewership of 5 people really excites me. Thanks guys for supporting me. You guys rock!!

4 Years & Counting: Off on an Adventure!

2009-08-06T10:06:00.000-04:00

We woke up at a reasonable time in the morning, even after having such a long tiring evening the night before. Unfortunately there was a lot to be done (packing our beach gear, lunch, & car), and we didn't leave the house until close to 10AM. For us that's pretty much normal, and we went with the flow.

We were not the only folks headed towards the beach (you know all of the other hundreds of people who were flocking down there too), and Hubby and I did not want to face too much traffic. I suggested taking 13 down to Middletown to get on Route 1. We would save money on tolls and enjoy the open road a bit. It just so happens that there was a lot of traffic at the Middletown exit, and Hubby turned back around to continue on 13. Later we went back on Route 1, didn't like the traffic, and hopped back on 13. We got off just in time for Sonic!!

We didn't intend to make the pit stop, but it was now or later.. we chose now. Since they serve their full menu all day long, we didn't have to choose just from the breakfast menu. I decided to go with a nice breakfast burrito to start my day, and Hubby chose 3 or 4 items from the dollar menu. You can see the size difference of my burrito next to his $1 burrito in the bottom left.

We enjoyed our satisfying lunch break, and before long we were back on the road again. We hit more lights and drove through Dover in broad daylight, which is very unusual for us since Hubby and I prefer late night Sonic runs. Later we joined back with our fellow beach travelers on Route 1.

Traffic... we saw a lot of cars on our way down. Luckily we had each others company to keep our spirits up. I noticed a lot of cars from other states, mainly Pennsylvania and New Jersey. Am I the only one who thought that Delaware beaches only attracted Delawareans? I was definitely surprised, especially after our trip and seeing that many bloggers visited Rehoboth this summer. Hubby never likes to be stuck in traffic. Instead he likes to find alternative routes, and this is where the navigation comes to play. We took a short cut...

We were surrounded by farmland! It was a welcoming sight, and boy we were glad to be away from civilization for a short while. It's amazing how you can get off a busy well traveled road and come across such a beautiful scenery.

Later we had to face our traffic problems and continue on our trip down south. The nice short cut was definitely too short. I enjoyed the peaceful drive while it lasted.

With traffic continuing to build up, will Hubby and Yin struggle to keep sane? Stay tuned for the next chapter of our adventure!

Previously:
4 Years & Counting: Shopping on a Friday

4 Years & Counting: Shopping on a Friday

2009-08-04T22:35:00.000-04:00

To jump start our anniversary weekend, Hubby and I went to King of Prussia for some relaxing, shopping fun. It was a Friday evening, and it was the perfect way to rewind and end the long week. Yes, Hubby loves to shop with me. I have to be one of the luckiest girls out there to have Hubby as my best friend and shopping buddy too.

We go to KOP often enough that we even have a preferred parking lot. It's a convenient location outside of Nordstroms, and there is almost always parking available. I made Hubby point at our awesome parking spot. I get happy over the small things in life.

Aww! He even posed for me in front of our entrance! He then later asked why I was behind the camera instead of him. I need pictures for my blog!! Duh! Hehe. We actually don't shop at Nordstrom. We like to use the entrance to get to all the other stores within the mall, and J.Crew is definitely one of them. Yup, J.Crew is located right outside of the main Nordstrom entrance. Muahahahaha!

Shopping was fun and adventurous as usual. Hubby found himself a polo at J.Crew in a lovely shade of yellow. It was on sale with an additional 20% off. Unfortunately I left empty handed, but that's what happens when I drown in their smallest size (it was a dress shirt). I did find some luck at American Eagle. I pretty much hate that store since I worked there for the holiday season one year, but I tend to go back for their jeans. They're the only place that carries jeans that fit my body, both around my waist and length. I left with a pair of jean shorts (my first!) and a pair of bermuda shorts, which I later returned since they were a tad too roomy for me.

As usual we spent a lot of time at Urban Outfitters. I thought there was an awesome sale going on, but they didn't have much in store. I found this moustache key holder, and I made Hubby pose with it for me. I want him to grow a moustache for me one day for just a few minutes to show me. Apparently he did it once upon my request, but I was too sleepy to comprehend what was happening.

We spent the evening at the mall, and we left around closing time. Of course the adventure does not stop there. Hubby decided to take a back road to get back home, and we saw this...

The storm caused some damage to the trees, and the road was blocked. Hubby saw it as a challenge at first, and he actually tried to drive through all the debris. That didn't work out so well. Crazy Hubby!

Needless to say this was a tiring evening for the Hubby and Wifey duo. We didn't get home until late, and we didn't get much prepared for the next day. Will Hubby and Wifey wake up in time for the beach? Stay tuned.

Crafty Yin

2009-08-03T14:46:00.000-04:00

It was Friday morning, and I just realized how much I had fallen behind. My anniversary was the very next day, and I had yet to make a card for Hubby. Bad Yin. I had very little to no vision, and I just took it one step at a time. That tiny vision only consisted of incorporating a photo of us, possibly from the year we first met. Luckily I had one laying around, and I tried to work everything around that one photo.

I have a lot of craft supplies (but never enough to satisfy this crafty heart of mine), and they are scattered throughout the room in various containers and boxes. Whenever I start a project it gets messy.. really messy. For this project I limited myself to using the following items:

card stock in light blue, brown, and cream
2 in 1 paper cutter from Purple Cows
decorative corner punch from Fiskars
clear polymer stamp, stamping block, and ink
envelope and liner template from Paper Source
3M Scotch brown postal wrapping paper
others: scissors, glue stick, pencil, pen, eraser, ruler

Sometimes I don't always have the perfect piece of scrapbook paper to use as a background for my cards. I just use clear stamps to create my own background on card stock to get the perfect look. In this case I used a flower stamp using white ink on brown card stock. To get the designed paper look, I made sure to sure to stamp on the edges too.

After cutting, stamping, gluing, and trimming, I came up with this beauty here:

This card took me hours to complete, but it sure was satisfying to see the end result. Hubby was super happy with his card, and I enjoyed getting back into craft mode. Life is swell.

Watermark

2009-08-02T16:43:00.001-04:00

I love how pictures can easily tell a story just by its presence. I have always been the type of blogger who tries to include a picture in every entry possible. Instead of just words, there is a visual effect to play out the story. I prefer using my own images because it plays with my own experiences and makes my blog more personal. In the beginning I would just upload my pictures without any worries. Now that I am an avid blogger (now both reading and writing), I have noticed that more popular blogs fall victim to their material being stolen. Sometimes it's straight up a copy and paste sleezy job where they take all of the credit.

I have found that food bloggers are often victim to this. Wandering Chopsticks was one of the first who introduced me to this subject, and she had to take measures by adding watermarks to her photos. She writes more about this in her guide to blogging. It made me more aware of the problem, and I knew that it would be something I would have to start doing in the near future. While my blogs do not create much traffic, I do want to cover all of the bases of "what if's."

With pictures usually being the first to be "stolen," I looked into adding watermarks for my photos. At first I thought it would be difficult without the use of Photoshop or some sort of special photo manipulation software. I played around with Irfanview, the program we use to view our photos on the computer, and I found a solution to my problem. It was easy, and now I'm practically a pro at inserting watermarks. By using this method, I am limited by the creativity of the watermark but I don't mind. My photos are no where near professional and artistic. A simple watermark is all I need.

Want to give it a try? Here are my Yin friendly directions:

Steps to Creating a Watermark w/ Irfranview

Download Irfanview here. Don't worry. It's free and Yin approved!
Open up a photo in Irfanview.
Using your mouse, click on the part of the photo you would like to be watermarked and drag to create a box.
Next click on "edit" and select "insert text into selection" or simply use the nifty shortcut of [ctrl] + [t].
Type the text into the text box.
Click on "choose font" on the bottom right to get to the font selection. Be creative and use a fun font. Also change the size and color to fit your photo.
Choose your text alignment - left, center, or right
Click "ok," and you're all done!
Don't forget to save your work! I recommend saving it as a new photo so that you still have the original copy with no watermark.

Simple enough, right? Do make sure that it's everything you want it to be. Don't be afraid to click "undo" multiple times to perform some trial and error to figure out the perfect font, color, size, and alignment. While it is time consuming, it is definitely worth it. Go ahead and give it a try!

Sneak Peak

2009-08-01T00:57:00.000-04:00

sneak peak of anniversary recap!

I Love Stillmotion

2009-07-31T14:43:00.001-04:00

Stillmotion, I love you. You bring tears to my eyes when I see your amazing work. I wish I could afford you on my wedding day so that you can tell our story through your lenses. I cried like a baby after watching this video of Carolyn and Raj's wedding. I even watched it twice (the second time with the split screen of the couple's reaction), and I cried even more.

raj + carolyn // same day edit . TN from stillmotion on Vimeo.

raj + carolyn // the split screen sde reaction from stillmotion on Vimeo.

via Weddingbee Pro

Dreamy Hello Lucky Invitations

2009-07-30T09:59:00.000-04:00

In the beginning of wedding planning I only knew invitations to look like this:

{very traditional invites}

Both of my sisters chose the same style with only slight differences in wording (as in replace one couple's name with the other). While boring, I thought this was what everyone did for their invitations. How do you stand out from all the other weddings? It's all about the details. My one sister in particular was very picky about the fonts, border, color, and every little detail you can possibly find in traditional invitations (which doesn't look like much).

Then I stepped into the online world of wedding planning, which totally opened my eyes up to creative DIY invites (people actually make their own.. wow) and something called letterpress. At first I just thought letterpress stood for pure awesome invites that attracted the eye with stunning colors and textures. It was nothing like those invitations of my past. I was immediately drawn.

Blue Dahlia Bridal Shower Invites from ilee papergoods

What is letterpress exactly? Here's the break down via my trusty Wikipedia source:

relief printing of text and image using a press with a "type-high bed" printing press and movable type, in which a reversed, raised surface is inked and then pressed into a sheet of paper to obtain a positive right-reading image
normal form of printing text in the West from its invention by Johannes Gutenberg in the mid-15th century until the 19th century, and remained in wide use for books and other uses until the second half of the 20th century
small amount of high-quality art and hobby letterpress printing remains
fine letterpress work is crisper than offset litho because of its impression into the paper, giving greater visual definition to the type and artwork
many of these small letterpress shops survive by printing fine editions of books or by printing upscale invitations and stationery, often using presses that require the press operator to feed paper one sheet at a time by hand
most letterpress equipment prints only one color at a time
classic feel and finish of letterpress papers takes printing back to an era of quality and craftsmanship that is not often found in other printing methods today
recently undergone a revival in the USA, Canada and the UK, under the general banner of the 'Small Press Movement'

Take a look at the letterpress making process with Pistachio Press on Etsy

I clicked on a few links and soon realized that letterpress would never ever be in my budget =(. At around $25 per invite for the premium stuff, it costs more than I'm willing to spend on a single piece of clothing. It costs more than a dinner for two. My letterpress dreams were crushed. I did find that there were other options for around $10 an invitation, but that is still way too much. I can't even afford to buy a letterpress wedding invitation sample. They run for $5-$10 a pop.. ouch. I just have to admire the pretty invites from the computer screen and try to refrain myself from drooling all over my keyboard. Or do I?

Fast forward a couple months, and I ran into this contest on the Weddingbee boards for a Hello Lucky letterpress/digital invitation samples giveaway. Hello Lucky is pretty much the letterpress gods, and their invites can go for a pretty penny (try 2500 of them for each invite). Even though my chances of winning are always slim, I took my chances and entered.

how dreamy... swooon

With 59 people entering, I didn't have much of a chance at winning (well 1 in 59). The prize went to someone else, and I forgot about the contest. I went back to the motherland for a while, and I came home to a normal life. With little to no wedding planning happening in those 5 weeks I was gone, it took me a while to get back into the swing of things. One evening while checking my email on my phone, I came across a message from Weddingbee. Later I checked the email from the computer and saw this:

Was I dreaming? Did Bee, the creator of Weddingbee, really contact me?? I freaked out a bit, did a little dance, and had the biggest smile on my face. Of course I replied right away with all of my information, and I patiently waited for the best package to arrive a few days later.

OMG!! a package from the most famous bee of all, THE BEE!! I love the cute Weddingbee sticker!

I carefully opened the package to discover the yummy Hello Lucky letterpress invitation samples... swoooooon! Do you see my little extra bonus on the left?

I even took a little photo session with my precious letterpress samples. Surprisingly, these photos were all done by me using Hubby's camera.

These samples were such a delight, and I had so much fun touching every one of them. There were also digital invitations from Hello Lucky, which was recently introduced earlier this year. It gives the buyer the option to get the beautiful letterpress designs for a fraction of the cost with digital printing. The invites have definitely provided me with a lot of inspiration. The coordinating response cards and envelopes are dreamy, and I cannot stop looking at them.

Thank you, Bee, for making this girl's letterpress wish come true. Now I just need to enter into every contest offering free letterpress invitations. Hehe.

THE Wedding Rehearsal Dress

2009-07-29T13:53:00.000-04:00

This past weekend Hubby and I celebrated our anniversary with an adventurous trip to the beach. It's pretty much tradition for us to make it down there once a year in the summer to take advantage of the sun and nice beachy breeze. We made a pit stop at the Tanger Outlets in Rehobeth to wait for the traffic to die down. While walking past BCBG, I saw this beauty in the window...

BCBG Maxaria Strapless Appliqué Dress - $398 at Nordstroms

In the wedding world this dress is super famous for being THE perfect rehearsal dress. Just look at it.. it pretty much screams awesomeness. This is so in demand, and you would have to be a crazy Weddingbee stalker to understand how amazing it was that I even found it in the first place.

Being the crazy obsessive bride to be, I had to try it on. There were three dresses on the rack, and they all happen to be a size zero. I really hoped it would fit. Even though I'm small, I'm not that small... or am I?

It fit like a glove. I'm not sure exactly how I was able to fit into a size zero, especially gaining all the weight back that I had lost from my trip to China. Yes, the dress actually does look as pretty in real life as it does in photos you've seen online.

Here I am trying to see whether it looks good on me. I love the rouching up on top, and I might just have to incorporate that into my dream wedding dress. It makes me feel comfortable and confident. Even my small boobies look good in this dress. Brownie points!!

Can you tell that I spent a lot of time looking at the mirror? Well I had nothing else better to do while Hubby was talking on the phone. He was thoughtful enough to snap the photos of the dress, even while talking.

I even look good from the side.. impressive! Actually I just look stick thin. Don't be fooled folks. I don't actually look like that in real life. It was just the angle at which the picture was taken.

This is the only decent photo of myself looking at the camera. I looked like one hot mess trying on the dress with my bikini top underneath (tucking the straps into the boobage area) and wearing flip flops. I had to crop these photos to disguise the ugliness of my footwear with this dress.

With an original price of $398 online, can you guess how much it was going for at the outlet? Does $199 sound pretty decent at half off? Well let's try a mere $89 for the most in demand wedding rehearsal dress out there! That's 77% off the original price!! Now here's the kicker.. I didn't purchase the dress. Even for that ridiculously cheap price, I left it back on the rack and walked away. You must think I'm crazy. Actually I do think that I was crazy now that I think back on it. It fit me like a glove. It made me look good (and skinny too)! Even if I decided that it wasn't for me, I would have no problem selling it online to another bride and actually be able to make a profit.

I walked away because it wasn't in the budget. There are other priorities in life, and even for a bargain steal of $89, I couldn't justify the cost at the time. Examining the dress, I felt that the materials used felt kind of cheap for a BCBG dress. Don't get me wrong. The material worked very well on my body, and it hugged all the right parts. It just didn't feel like high quality. The flowers were a bit messy and frayed at the ends, which is expected for the technique they used to get the flowers to look the way they did. In the end it just wasn't for me. I might regret this one day in the future (today might be that day), but at least I got the experience to try on the most in demand dress out there today.

By the way, I'm not the only one who walked away from the dress. Mrs. Quiche was not satisfied with her purchase and returned it back to the store.

Inspiration Board!

2009-07-28T15:35:00.000-04:00

I made my very first inspiration board today, and I am a tad proud of myself. Lately I have been drawn to pretty shades of pink, and these photos might just convince me that pink is the perfect wedding color for us. Now it's time to convince Hubby...

from left to right:

row 1: flowers, place cards, shoes, lovely necklace
row 2: wedding dress, invitations, cake, balloons
row 3: table setting, dessert table

Happy Anniversary!!

2009-07-25T08:37:00.001-04:00

Dear Hubby,

Can you believe it's been 4 years since we first met and fell in love? That sure does sound like a heck of a long time, but it's just a small dent in the lifetime we'll spend together. You are my best friend, my fiance, my soul mate, and my everything! I cannot wait to see what the future has in store for us. I love you. Happy anniversary!

Love,
Yin

{Let's take a look back down memory lane...}

{me being shy}

{hubby being relaxed}

{at morimoto's - just friends}

{we're officially together}

{at my sister's wedding - august 2005}

{spring 2009}

from poke to I do

Next Chapter - Family

After I Do: Honesty & Lying

After I Do: Changes

After I Do: Date Night

After I Do: Disagreements

After I Do: Divorce

Inspiration - Spud Bar

After I Do: Appreciation

After I Do: In-Laws

After I Do: Leave and Cleave

After I Do: First Anniversary

After I Do: Household Chores

After I Do: Other Relationships

After I Do: Name-Change Decisions

After I Do: Wedding Regrets

After I Do: Children

After I Do: Changes

After I Do: Finances

Dry Spell But Not a Farewell

Inspiration - City Hall

Inspiration - Heart Garland

Happy 8 Months!!

Inspiration - Elopement

Petal & Print

Video Friday - I Do!

Inspiration - Floating Flowers

Inspiration - Mustache Bridal Party

Inspiraton - Drifting By Dress

Non-Wedding Related News!!

Inspiration - Tablescape

The Going, Going, Gown Event!

82 Days & I'm Finally Ready!

Video Friday - Country Wedding

Inspiration - Under Water

Video Friday - Dooo, Dooo, I Do!

Wish List - Return Address Stamp

Video Friday - Rock and Roll Hearts

Ba

Post w/ Content! Shocker!

Video Friday - "My Wife, No Touch"

Inspiration - Vintage Shoot

Inspiration - Photobooth by the Sea

Inspiration - Doily

Inspiration - Tea Cups

Sneak Peak -- Wedding Pictures!!

Happy Father's Day!

We're Married!!

The Big Day!!

Stress

Sneak Peak -- Hair Piece

Featured!! We're Famous!

A Talk with my Dad

The Non-existent List...

Wedding Break Down

Engagement Inspiration

Our Parents

Playing Catch Up

Wedding Bands - Check!

Drifting By Dress

Not Like Most Gals

Being Reminded

Oh boy.. here it goes...

The Story of Us - A Side Note

Gadgets & Projects

Online Shopping -- So Enticing!

Preview - Ring Shots

Going in the Right Direction

The Story of Us - Part I

Cleaning Leads to Wedding Planning, Right?

Wedding Reading Material

Don't Sweat the Small Stuff

Let the Planning Begin...

Thrifty But Not a Magician

Pushing the Date Back...

Making a List

Having a Date...

Blog Worthy News

*chirp chirp*

Joe Simon Wedding Films = Amazing

chirp chirp